#1
Work in Progress. Crits very welcome and appreciated. C4C

I can’t believe that we’re still alive
I don’t know if I can stay here anymore
The doors are closing and my hope is moping
But I can’t help but showing you

Before you and I were stuck here
We feared being stuck together forever
Well now we are, but it’s not that hard to get along
It’s not so hard to get along

Would you rather be alone?
Or would you like to come home to my arms?
My arms are yours and they open doors
To set us free!

Don’t lock your mind like legs locked with terror
Don’t be so scared to look in the mirror
What you see I see too
Every time I look at you

Don’t hate what you are
I liked you from the start
There’s no need to change for me
When you are perfect babe

Would you rather be alone?
Or would you like to come home to my arms?
My arms are yours and they open doors
To set us free!


Relax in my arms everything is all right
Breathe easy to make it through this night
Tomorrow we'll try and make this work
I don't want you to get hurt
#2
sounds cliched, good effort, remember to go to try and say something and the rhymes will come and go. The arctic monkeys did that on 'Whatever people say I am that's what I'm not' and alex managed to get 'something' to rhyme with 'stomach' half rhymes can make your work sound more natural while still exaggerating it as rhymes do.
#4
What this needed is a few long-assed words. The terms you refer to on so many occasions are just overly simple. It small doses, they are perfect and fitting, just like more complicated expressions. This needs to shine more with ambiguouty and cynical ramblings. There was a few moments where I saw a shine of writing: Fourth verse... well thats it actually.
Althought there are cliches, its sweet enough to get by. It just needs pimping, majorly.

Digitally Clean