This is my first thread in here, AND my first ever song, any tips would be HUGELY thankful.

ok here goes,

'Theres only one thing that i want from life,
I only want to be on TV
To skip out all the Work and Strife
Just make me a Celebrity

Make me Famous, Make me Famous
I know about the Sex and Drugs
I know its very dangerous

I wanna be a celebrity
I wont need my virginity
I wont need my dignity
As long as im eating in the Ivy

Make me Famous, Make me famous
I know about the sex and drugs
I know its very dangerous

Some men Say they dont care about the money
They dont care about the Clothes
They dont care about the Honeys
But those guys are playing a game
Cos all men want is a slice of Fame'

-Elliot Bland

Like i said its a start,
I know its got a few dodgy rhymes but yea....

sounds like a pink song sorry to say that,but it dose
its kinda repeating like its the same thing over and over
it has potential,but i think you can do better.
Ibanez sz720fm,Ibbly RG350DX, Custom Tele-> Dunlop 535Q->RAT Pro co II-> Ibanez Fuzz->Marshall Haze 40.
Tascam US-800 and a hand full of Mics into Nedundo 4

my music, new recording on the way in 2014

[B]insert witty italicized quote here