#1
James is dead and I cant care,
He bled dry after their last kiss,
Left the razor on the stairs,
And he wont even be missed.

She heard the news today,
So sad she grabbed a gun,
Gave everything to him and is giving back,
Now her life is done.

Barlely knew them myself,
But still it changed me,
How much pain they'd felt,
Until they set it free.

What do I have to do with this,
Where do I come in,
Why does it strike me so hard,
When will it end?

They layed her in the ground,
Next to him,
Because of the note they'd found,
Said its what she wanted..

So I dress in black,
Because its what they drown in,
And the preacher turns his back,
They commited a loving sin.


This is kinda like a little bit of poetry I just made. Tell me what you think...
#2
I love this.
its insanely depressing but so good at the same time
Current Gear-
Ibanez RG321
Peavey Rage 258
Rogue LX400
Fender Rumble 15
#3
Good, a little emo, but good.

Work on the flow. It doesnt have to 'rhyme', but if you chose your words more carefully this would be awesome.
"You can drink an ugly chick hot, but you can’t drink a fat chick skinny."

Fender: HSS Stratocaster

Modulus: 1991 Q5

Peavey:158BASS
Marshall: MG30FDX
Acoustic: B200