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#1
i go to a christian school and for drama class i need to do a monologue so give me some ideas
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Oh, and this is the internet. I have the right to be a douchebag. Fuck off.
#3
sodom and gomorrah, full of anal sex
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Awww, thanks Frenchy

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#4
I like the one about the flat 5th, I forget which book it was in, but it was about creating the world, and how not everything could be perfect, something like that. That's one of my favorites. or david and goliath!!
#5
i think someones already doing golieth
Quote by RizzoWashburn
Oh, and this is the internet. I have the right to be a douchebag. Fuck off.
#7
Sixpence None the Richer. The story about how a son of a very poor family asked his father for some money (a sixpence) so he could buy his father a gift. The father obliged and replied, sixpence none the richer because he essentially bought his own gift.
The point is that God is giving the gift that we possess and that we should serve that humbly.

The term is actually from Christian Apologetics - written by CS Lewis but it'll work.
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Last edited by Harmonius at Sep 21, 2008,
#11
The one where Jesus got pissed off that his birthday was on Christmas, he moaned he got less presents than everyone else.

RMF


I was much further out than you thought
And not waving but drowning.
I was much too far out all my life
And not waving but drowning.
#13
Turn water into wine all dramatic and David Blaine-like.
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#15
How about the one in the book of numbers, where a man got sentenced to death by stoning for gathering sticks on the sabbath? all in Gods name of course
#17
Tell them a story about evolution.
Quote by hb15577
dude your not funny your an immature faggot, sig that
#18
Quote by Spamwise
Do the one where god commanded his people to commit genocide.


equally as good. god really is a prick wouldnt you say?
#19
Quote by Craigo
Do the bears mauling the youths in the woods

Please do that one TS.
I can honestly say I have really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like.


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#20
My favourite was the first page:

"To my darling Candy,
All characters portrayed in the book are fictional and are in fact not real..."

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#21
Quote by Spamwise
Do the one where god commanded his people to commit genocide.


+1

Quote by Supertait
equally as good. god really is a prick wouldnt you say?


he is, he really is, i cant believe people worship a mass murderer
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Awww, thanks Frenchy

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#22
Quote by boreamor
My favourite was the first page:

"To my darling Candy,
All characters portrayed in the book are fictional and are in fact not real..."

Amazing
#23
Do the one where he makes the families Yacht disappear by blowing it up on spring break....Book of Gob....Bluth
#25
Quote by Våd Hamster
This must be the definition of asking the wrong thing in the wrong place.


So true lol
#26
A reenactment of the crucification.
DRINK APPLE JUICE
O.J. will kill you
#28
how does God tell people to commit genocide?
I am a traveler of both time and space, to be where I have been

To sit with elders of the gentle race, this world has seldom seen
#29
Quote by shift3448
i think someones already doing golieth


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#30
Quote by noleafcloverML
how does God tell people to commit genocide?


read the old testament, one of the books, i think its Job or summut.

or go here instead:

www.thebricktestament.com
Quote by FrenchyFungus


Awww, thanks Frenchy

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#31
Quote by noleafcloverML
how does God tell people to commit genocide?


He doesn't. The majority of atheists on this website have no idea what they're talking about when it comes to scripture.

But, the TS could have done worse. He could have asked this question on youtube, where all the atheists have multiple accounts and spam the crap out of all the theist vids.
#32
Quote by noleafcloverML
how does God tell people to commit genocide?



He doesn't. The majority of atheists on this website have no idea what they're talking about when it comes to scripture.

God commanded the Israelites on at least one occasion to wipe out an entire nationality of people, including women, children, and even the animals. I'm looking for the reference now.
#33
Quote by tonedeafidiot
OHOHOHOH! Do the Revelation and when it gets to the part about the beast and the harlot, play said song by A7X.



lol yessss!

or play chapter for by a7x . which is about cain and abel.

or the wicked end. by a7x. which is about judgement day and the flood. and messiah and whatnot
#34
Well if they were openly against God, why wouldnt he?
I am a traveler of both time and space, to be where I have been

To sit with elders of the gentle race, this world has seldom seen
#35
Quote by Spamwise
God commanded the Israelites on at least one occasion to wipe out an entire nationality of people, including women, children, and even the animals. I'm looking for the reference now.


All armed forces did that during those times. If even one person was left alive, it was his or (rarely) her duty to avenge the death of his or her people for the rest of his or her life. Kill or be killed.
#36
Quote by noleafcloverML
Well if they were openly against God, why wouldnt he?


thats not the point, why destroy someone for not being with them?

its like a dictatorship, people spoke out against Stalin, Hitler, and they were killed.
Quote by FrenchyFungus


Awww, thanks Frenchy

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Hate humans? Click here
#38
Quote by thedudemeister
thats not the point, why destroy someone for not being with them?

its like a dictatorship, people spoke out against Stalin, Hitler, and they were killed.


You have never read the Bible, have you? Anyway, let's stop the arguing before the thread gets closed.
#39
Here are some,

Quote by Joshua 6:20-21 20
When the trumpets sounded, the people shouted, and at the sound of the trumpet, when the people gave a loud shout, the wall collapsed; so every man charged straight in, and they took the city. 21 They devoted the city to the LORD and destroyed with the sword every living thing in it—men and women, young and old, cattle, sheep and donkeys.

Quote by Joshua 11:12


12 Joshua took all these royal cities and their kings and put them to the sword. He totally destroyed them, as Moses the servant of the LORD had commanded. 13 Yet Israel did not burn any of the cities built on their mounds—except Hazor, which Joshua burned. 14 The Israelites carried off for themselves all the plunder and livestock of these cities, but all the people they put to the sword until they completely destroyed them, not sparing anyone that breathed. 15 As the LORD commanded his servant Moses, so Moses commanded Joshua, and Joshua did it; he left nothing undone of all that the LORD commanded Moses.




All armed forces did that during those times. If even one person was left alive, it was his or (rarely) her duty to avenge the death of his or her people for the rest of his or her life. Kill or be killed.

Those were human tactics. If god's ways are above humanity's ways, then why would he use the exact same tactics? Regardless, it's still genocide
#40
Quote by tonedeafidiot
You have never read the Bible, have you? Anyway, let's stop the arguing before the thread gets closed.


i have actually, i've read a fair bit into the old testament, and he did order the massacre of several thousand people.

and a good point, i'll stop now
Quote by FrenchyFungus


Awww, thanks Frenchy

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