Finally finished, I figured I'd start a new thread for it since it's undergone some massive changes since it was originally posted, and I didn't want the crit from before getting in the way.

This is mixed for RSE if you can use it. Use it. If you plan to listen to it without RSE then please open either the GP4 or the Midi, as they're mixed slightly differently.

Anyway, I'm rather proud of this one, so I'm hoping everyone enjoys it.

I should have an actual recording of this one up in the next month or two if things go well (although I have to figure out a good way to play that tapping lick in the Tra La La section, it kills me every time).
Really good. Actually, it's good enough that I would reccomend taking it down so no one steals it.

Musically, I only have two suggestions.

1. The middle acoustic section at 132, in my oppinion, needs to go somewhere before reverting back into the heavier riff. It almost sounds randomly placed in there. Don't get me wrong, it's good. Maybe you could expand on that section.

2. The ending is quite abrupt. I would work on it some more. As oppossed to essentially just cutting off the song, I would reccomend easing the listener out of the song. Perhaps fade out or cut back to just an acoustic.

Other than those bits, excellent job.

do you really need me to tell you how freaking good that was. one word, amazing, reminds me of true prog metal, not "lol time sigs" prog. Besides the odd ending, which i'd end with a sustained chord with all the instruments pulling away then coming back to finish on the last note. it's, well, perfect.

C4C https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=964516
Quote by Roc8995
I ran into some fingering issues. I can get it up to speed the way I've been fingering it, but I'm wondering if you guys have any better ideas, because it seems like there should be an easier way to finger this.

Don't worry there is Roc, there is
That was awesome. IMO it went on a bit too long but that's just my preference. Musically it was amazing. All the sections just worked dude. You changed the feel so seemlessly I was lagging behind! I don't know what else to say. I listened to it and I loved it.

My only criticism is that there were sections half way through where it felt as though you were going to outro it but carried on. Weak criticism I know, but there's not much else negative to say. Well done

If you don't mind, could you crit mine?
Thanks for the crits guys. My computer has suffered a rather catastrophic meltdown, so it'll take me a while to C4C, but I will definitely do it when I get things working again.
Holy freaking crap that was awesome, I bet your computer broke down when you wrote that from an awesome overload. I hope this remains an instrumental, because it's too damn freaking awesome for lyrics. I also love the fact that there is solos throughout basically the whole thing and it never gets stale or boring.

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I like the first part, it's so rock.
I like specially the drums, and obviously the riff.
Wow, the lead is awesome too.
Actually, the whole rock section is awesome (including the bass).

I didn't like Mysterious that much, but it certainly is good. The melodies didn't interest me that much though, although the whole nylon guitar thing is cool.

I guess the stereo mood whatever is kind of a fill, since it isn't that interesting, maybe you could add some piano or some other instrument in it.

The next rock part is great too, I keep liking the melodies..

I thought you were going to do like 5-in-one songs kind of, since you abruptely started the mysterious section, I suggest maybe to smoothen the transition (maybe with the drums, although the transition is not that bad so don't really bother about it).

I liked the phrigian part, so that is what the mood swing part is for
I also liked your use of phrigian dominant in the gypsy part, at least the first bars, I didn't quite liked the sweeping part, try improving the phrase.

The funky rock part was awesome, maybe you can put some slap bass in there too? (only a little?please? I want slap )

I didn't like the next part a lot, it repeated the melodies too much.

The pretty part was great, no criticism there.
The distorted part would sound better without the low clean guitar parts I think.

The moon triplets were also great, and almost all your leads are great too.
Well, now that we are at it, the acoustic outro was great too.

The thing that I didn't like was the way it ended, so abruptely. Try slowering the tempo down a little bit, and maybe change the backing chords rhythm to show that the piece is ending..

Great piece man..

Wanna crit one of mine?
Last one in sig if you can
Really awesome, love the arabian sounding themes you got there, and the solo, reminds me alot of Dream Theater .
The other rhytm work you got there is also very good, nice themes.
Don't quite care for the acoustic outro though, feels forced.
The drum work is good, really works well with the other instruments.
And again, love your solos.
Bravo good sir, bravo! Very impressive. It has a great mood to it, and is very creative and sounds professional. Everything meshes together so well. i didn't hear a single section that I didn't agree with.
Thanks for the CRIT =]

Anyways, this is really awesome. The solo at bar 82 is awesome. It sounds Egyptian to me, it's really fantastic. Solo at Bar 156 was pretty sweet as well.

Only thing is that you could probably turn that song into 3. Other than that its really original and sounds nice. Good job!
Quote by I_love_Thrash
Only thing is that you could probably turn that song into 3. Other than that its really original and sounds nice. Good job!

Funny you should say that. There were actually 3 different sections that I removed from this version of the song. Each of those sections has ended up as the basis for a new song.

Thanks for the crits guys!
I really have nothing bad to say about this. But, I feel like I'm wasting time if I'm not constructive so...
The clean section with the bass playing melody.... I would suggest making the arpeggiated guitar throw a tad bit of melody in the middle of the arpeggio's. Arpeggios get tiresome.
Also, the Pedal To The Moon section, although having a great solo, hearing the same riffs go on right there gets tiresome.
But, great job. Much better than I can do for an instrumental solo-reliant track. Trust me, I've tried.
*thumbs up*

says it all
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And now to steal... Just kidding - really solid stuff
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Wow! Really great man. I'm so used to so much pedal toning metalcore, and there's lot of it. This sounds really sweet, maybe not 100% my style of music, but nice stuff.

I like it all, especially the harmony. You're phrasing is so damn good it makes me want to cry, it sounds really nice. Also, as it's been said, maybe my only problem, is how abruptly it ended. Maybe you should fade out. Something like that.

Anyways, 10/10 definitlally. Also, thanks for already critting my one song.
firts of all thanks for you crit , I really apreciated it!
to your song , well pretty much everything has been said , it's really good , i don't really go into depth now because it would be a waste of time searching for mistakes that might probably found if you search long enough but I don't have that much time , one thing i'd really consider is, as said before , to work on the transition to the outro , it sounds a bit clumsy I think , also tbh I can't really find a lot of progressive rock in there although you mix up many different styles of guitar playing (such as the funk section) but having a look at time signatures and chord progression it's not really that progressive , but a very solid rockk instrumental
9/10 great job
keep on
why the hell does everyone think this is so good. this isnt that amazing
My Metal (gp5) Songs

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Wow this song has been brought back from the dead. I'm actually pretty close to having a real recording of this one done. Got the rhythm and drums recording, and a good portion of the leads, just have the really tough leads and bass left to do.

The ending is always going to be a point of contension I think. I was kind of going for Metallicas To Live is to Die, but in reverse.

Greymane; I know Prog was probably the wrong thing to call it, but it doesn't really fit into rock either. While it does stick to the 4/4 beat the whole time, there are constant key changes/modal interchange that just never happens in rock music. Plus there are actually a lot of exotic chords in there. I know it doesn't look like it since the rhythm guitar is mostly playing powerchords but I tried to use the lead guitar and bass combined with the rhythm guitars to imply all of these different chords.
alright sorry ill give it a crit. yeah i was in a bad mood or something. sorry about that, thanks for the crit man.
the rock
that intro riff is kind of classic rocky, not amazingly original, but somehow i like it. you probably already knew but in bar 13, the rhythm comes in with an e powerchord on beat 3, but the lead has its e come in half a beat earlier so it sounds kind of awkward. bar 18 im not too fond of, it just sounds weird to me. i cant explain it, but it does transition well into mysterious.
also good drums in here, you know how to set a mood well. but i think they could be louder.

mysterious: i dont know if its your song or my guitar pro, but the rhythms sound really strange. maybe partly because of the downstrokes for the chords, and the weird drum beat, and all those legato slide, im not sure, but its hard to follow. other than that nice guitar line and good harmony. liked it

happy a go go: feels like part of mysterious. its a good ending to the shortlived mysterious, but at the ending a bend 20 for the lead, it kind of sounds really happy, like lynyrd skynyrd sweet home alabama or something. then next bar its evil. i think if you changed this transition around a bit. like kept a note from one instrument going, maybe one that would sound "evil" compared to the lynyrd skynyrd thing. maybe like a diminished fifth kind of thing, or a g, a semitone above from the next chords.

mood swing in stereo: nice riff albeit a little cliche. and cool panning. definitely a good feature to captivate the listener. you have a good groove going with the slow drums, but at bar 41 i think the rhythm could be changed to keep that slow rhythmic groove.

return: no comment, just nice bringing it back. listeners probably wait for it and theyre satisfied when that part comes back.

phrydge: nice name... haha. excellent rhythms in the lead. it sounds good. not bad... but the rhythm guitar part is nothing new to my ears, haha very overused chromatic chugging.

figure skating with gypsies: nothing wrong here, well done.

is that some...: haha! i like this part alot. came out of nowhere, but i love it. its almost funny. you should change the bass to slap bass here.

epic lead out: feels like the ending, but you fooled me. good part

i feel pretty: kind of dissonant cause of the chromatics but somehow it works out to be pleasing. i like how you brought the rhythm guitar for the tra la la in here to foreshadow kind of. nice. '

tra la la: very nice part, perfectly done.

a broom: at first i like how you moved everything up a whole tone. but i think this kind of ruined the epicness of tra la la. the mood recently has gone up and down all over the place. i think theres no flow between 167 and 168 on lead. either you change 167, or 168 starts on a different note, or you dont repeat that same thing again.

pedal to the moon: i really liked this part, good rhythms, good leads, just i think that one bend in bar 197 shouldnt be there. your choice.

acoustic outro: i think this section is REALLY out of place. this part is beautiful on its own, but really is an ending for a beautiful epic song. this song has epic, but in a different way. this entire thing blew me away by the misplacement, as seeing the rest of your song it definitely seems like you know what youre doing.

overall a pretty good song, i was just moody and i gave it one quick look before. finish recording it, i bet it will sound a lot better with real sounds. good job
My Metal (gp5) Songs

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Quote by TEK34
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Head + dead = dead?

Just wow. I loved every bit of it.

I know that's not much of a crit, but if you have the time, could you check out Polka metal in my sig?
i dig, very Vai. I really have nothing to say though. (hope you like fluff)
Beginning - I like. It fits well with each other. I like the clean in the Mysterious
Return - I thought those parts were kind of boring the second time around
Phrydge/Gysies - the key is quite.. hm. I like how it sounds all exotic
I didn't like the Funk solo

The Pretty/Whitty could have used some upbeat piano or something
the next two soloish parts great

my favorite part of the song is the rhythm guitar's "groove" part after the sweeping solo

I don't see the criticism on the acoustics, I enjoyed them.

Overall it isn't my type (therefore making it kind of boring to me); BUT, it is composed well and everything fits together.
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pretty awesome. The structure makes it progressive I see and not wierd time signatures, which is clever, since those can kind of get boring after a bit(them not this). Can't say much bad about it-the drums pretty awesome through(I was listening in midi) Solos throughout were brilliant, it all flowed well, only time anything stood out as far as flow was concerned was the acoustic bit seemed a bit off after the Moon bit, although it was an awesome bit. That was minor though, I actually cant see much wrong. The "worst" bit I'd say was the funk bit, just because it was maybe not quite as interesting, but still was good? I like the transition to the Moon bit.
Didn't really tell you much there I suppose but it was really good.
If that was worth a return crit they're in my "sig?"- you crit one of my old ones didn't you!

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Seriously amazing stuff man. Honestly, I don't think you'll be able to get any negative crit outta me. It all flowed so well and the lead complimented the rest of the music really well. Personally, i think the ending was fine, but thats just me. Some really catchy chord progressions in there. This songs too good for me to waste its time deciding if its instrumental rock or prog :P

9.5/10 (cuz nobody's perfect)

Crit one of mine?
'My Apocalypse' from the sig
Sounds like Between The Buried And Me... gone prog rock Excellent job m8.
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LOL, for some reason the impression I get from you is like some wacky Frank Zappa of metal pulling pranks at the Grammys and telling crude jokes during interviews.
You realllllllllllly should take this off.. someone is gona steal this.
I played this in RSE and i found myself drifting off in a heavenly bliss of noise.
Please please. Take this off.
the transition to the ending acoustic part was a tad awkward otherwise beautiful
In real life i recomend maybe just doing an acoustic ending without the lead and chanting Oh-oh-ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Like a coheed and cambria style chant but slower and fading out. Look at the ending of the light and the glass by coheed and cambria for reference
Last edited by mtgold83 at Apr 2, 2009,
The Rock: Awesome. Classic, groovy, and it just makes you want to move. Good not having the rhythm guitar just strum chords, either.

Mysterious: Blended into great. Sounds great. Love the harmony.

Happy-A-Go-Go: Weird. Hah. Short... Not much too it.

Mood Swing In Stereo: Great... More minor-y.

Return: Awesome. LOVE the harmonies. Totally overwhelming, in a good way. Not a single part of it I don't love.

The Phrydge: A take on Return with a different lead? Regardless.

Figure Skating: Don't care much for this one.

Funk?: Great. Love the upbeat attitude to this part. Sounds very 70's. Then it gets more minor-y again, then feels more classic-rock-y.

Epic Lead-Out: Great. Love the harmony and how it ends.

I Feel Pretty: Love the melody here, too. The transition into it wasn't bad. I love how... weird it sounds when it turns electric again. But it's not bad, again.

Tra-la-la: Reminiscent of an old video game, which is never bad.

A Broom: Sorta like Tra-la-la, which I preferred, but still not bad. I like the riff when it turns minor-y again. (173)

A Pedal: Love the solo and the rhythm guitar here. Great work on this part. Classic rock-y again.

Acoustic: Amazing. Love the general melody. The solo is also quite good. Almost feels repetitive sometimes, but it pulls itself out with the little hammer-on-pull-offs. Ends a little strange, but still.

Overall, amazing. 9.9/10. It's not every day that something like this pops up on here.


Crit mine?

Said And Done, in my sig.
Wow man what can I say. You're got an incredible amount of writing talent. I couldn't really pick out a spot that I didn't enjoy. But as for parts I loved, well definitely you're opening riff, and then the melody in Mysterious was awesome. Besides that thoughout the whole song you have some INFECTIOUS grooves going on. Jizztacular