#1
Ran a search found bugger all.
sorry if this HAS been posted before however.

Anyway, friends can be pretty darn stupid sometimes...
For instance. At our collage there is a memorial bench (some cleaning lady died or something) in the courtyard, where my friends a I hang out.
One day one of the girls asks.
"Is she buried under there? "
lol.

We call her Gorm for obvious reasons.
So, do share, lets all have a giggle at stupidity.
Quote by jetfuel495

"my goal is to live forever. im doin pretty good so far. and if i fail, at least i wont be around to disappoint myself"

#2
They say they're all not twats! Can you believe that!?
The DNA results show that Jeremy Kyle is a nob.


Quote by titsmcgee852
I want to look at your sexual naked body.
#3
Quote by DiddyDinkles
Ran a search found bugger all.
sorry if this HAS been posted before however.

Anyway, friends can be pretty darn stupid sometimes...
For instance. At our collage there is a memorial bench (some cleaning lady died or something) in the courtyard, where my friends a I hang out.
One day one of the girls asks.
"Is she buried under there? "
lol.

We call her Gorm for obvious reasons.
So, do share, lets all have a giggle at stupidity.


*Points At Whole Post* Nothing This Bad.
#4
one of my friends asked me how to spell grid
WTF?!?
Bands to see before I die:
Again:
Machine Head
Lamb Of God
JFAC
BTBAM
TesseracT
Pendulum

For the First time:
Periphery
Texures
Monuments
Mumford & Sons
The Prodigy
Paolo Nutini

CASTODIUM!!!
myspace.com/castodium
#5
"Wat up home dawg"
"fuk you homeslice"
Extispicy: Predicting The Future Though The Study Of Animal Entrails...
#6
som one said to me
friend - yeah i know someon who has that autopsy thing
me - what the funk are you talking about you cant "have autopsy"
friend - yeah you can you idiot, that thing where ya cant look at flashing lights
me - *facepalm* thats epilepsy you 6 foot turd streak
friend - no way its autopsy
me - *stab*

true story.
Originally Posted by Chromeproguitar
they make horrible noises in the middle of the night (is it sex?)

Quote by CliffIsAngry
I guess she's pretty hot if you're into that "having a good music video, but not better than Beyonce's" kind of thing...
#7
While driving 15 over the speed limit, heading straight for a median and not slowing down "Woah......****!.....cool."

"Ryan, what should my next tattoo be?"
"A manatee.....eating a cheeseburger."
Quote by Altered_Carbon
That's some bony hipster sex, which may be the best kind.
#8
Quote by DiddyDinkles
Ran a search found bugger all.
sorry if this HAS been posted before however.

Anyway, friends can be pretty darn stupid sometimes...
For instance. At our collage there is a memorial bench (some cleaning lady died or something) in the courtyard, where my friends a I hang out.
One day one of the girls asks.
"Is she buried under there? "
lol.

We call her Gorm for obvious reasons.
So, do share, lets all have a giggle at stupidity.



Enough said
#9
ha one time my friend and i were
walking home from school and we passed by a
nice looking car.
"what kind of car was that?" i asked
he replies, "i think it was a Ford Toyota"

...
#10
Quote by Here_is_no_why
While driving 15 over the speed limit, heading straight for a median and not slowing down "Woah......****!.....cool."

"Ryan, what should my next tattoo be?"
"A manatee.....eating a cheeseburger."



How is that stupid?!?! That's brilliant!!!
#11
Well according to a friend, a big part of the *****s over here are *****s because they like having a lot of sex. Not because they have a damn family to feed and no education that would allow them to pay the bills .
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#12
Quote by SeveralSpecies
How is that stupid?!?! That's brilliant!!!

+1
Quote by jetfuel495

"my goal is to live forever. im doin pretty good so far. and if i fail, at least i wont be around to disappoint myself"

#13
my friend claims he went to a gig in which the 'drums were so loud, he floated'
Sig space available, give me some praise
#14
A friend is convinced my razorback has 'distortion' even when unplugged..
#15
My friend Danny, not 10 minutes ago said

"I wouldn't be seen ****in' dead in a church!"

I just came back with "I don't think you have a choice with that one, Danny."
Posted from Ubuntu.

Squier Precision Bass Special in Antique Burst (LH)
Rotosound Swing 66s, 45-105

On slapping on a bass:
Quote by supersac
pretend its a woman
i have no helpful advice

#16
Quote by druggietoad2k5
My friend Danny, not 10 minutes ago said

"I wouldn't be seen ****in' dead in a church!"

I just came back with "I don't think you have a choice with that one, Danny."


I think your friend just got ownd.
Quote by jetfuel495

"my goal is to live forever. im doin pretty good so far. and if i fail, at least i wont be around to disappoint myself"

#18
I had got drunk the day before and my friend knew I had and in the morning(about 15 hours after him knowing I was drunk) asked "Are you still drunk?"
Quote by Tyler Durden
It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything.

Erowid
#19
I cant think of any stories.. I dont think i have any friends..

but i love it when you pwn a friend like the "i wouldnt be seen dead in a church" thing above.. that makes you feel awesome.
"You're a twat!"- That dude in morrisons

"You Ugly git!" - That girl in the restaurant

"You Were a Mistake!" - Mum

just a few of my fans..



#20
"Jesus is my god"
... For A Pair Of Brown Eyes

Quote by Bladez22
smoke, you get more awesome by the minute..... You have an epic beard, live near woods, listen to metal, grill stuff using makeshift bbqs out of old cans, and now we find out you have stabbed someone in the dick
#21
One of my mates didn't know who Hitler was, nor whether or not he was alive.
She's 16 for God's sake! Did all those years of school teach her nothing?
#22
You're from Liverpool, enough said xD

I'm from Runcorn so I do sympathise however. We've got a pretty much 100% scouse population here too... all stupid or weedheads.
Posted from Ubuntu.

Squier Precision Bass Special in Antique Burst (LH)
Rotosound Swing 66s, 45-105

On slapping on a bass:
Quote by supersac
pretend its a woman
i have no helpful advice

#23
Quote by AceOfBlades
One of my mates didn't know who Hitler was, nor whether or not he was alive.
She's 16 for God's sake! Did all those years of school teach her nothing?


Same happened to me, on my old school a girl asked "do you know who that Hitler guy is?" I said "yeah" and she replied "So what is he doin right now?"

...What!?
#24
Quote by AceOfBlades
One of my mates didn't know who Hitler was, nor whether or not he was alive.
She's 16 for God's sake! Did all those years of school teach her nothing?


Lol that reminds me of the time when my brother was convinced that Evil Knievel was Hitler's name.

"Ohhh I know what concentration camps are, it was those things Evil Knieval had in like World War 2 right?"
Quote by Ed Hunter
I took out a fly with my jet of piss once. I felt like God!



“This is ridiculous; my job is to sit here and do this bloo-loo-loo-loo, bloo-loo-loo-loo” - Paul Gilbert on sweep picking.
#25
My friends said that I wasn't funny.
Thats pretty stupid.
I think I'm hillarious =P
Quote by masterohumans
You can yell at anybody for anything as longas you're holding a Bible. I've learned that.
#26
I was with my friend today and we were talking about music. He said 'Name me a famous drummer' and this girl infront turned around and said 'Jimi Hendrix!!!"


#27
Friend 1: "Cold Potatoes aren't hot"
Friend 2: "What if you bake them?"
WARUM TUT ES WEH, WENN ICH PINKLE?!
Quote by goest
I'm going to take this opportunity to initiate my campaign to replace the phrase "Taking a shit" with "Busting a grumpy."


Quote by Axelfox
Disregard that,i suck cocks.
#29
friend: "i can smoke all this salvia and nothing will happen"
me: "k koo"


2 minutes later...

friend: " holy f*ck, man can't feel my body"
me: *facepalm*
"Where the Beatles wanted to hold your hand, the Stones wanted to fuck your sister or daughter"

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