#1
Poem. Moonglade is the reflection of the moon on water.



I walk into the night fearless.
I head towards the lake cluelessly blinded
by the self-finding I’m on course to.
An oak branch, thick and scarred,
slaps the moonglade, destroying beauty,
letting it reform, then destroying it some more;
the salt in the scar.

Fireflies perform acrobatic miracles,
fleeting light shows about my head.
They intensify, like lightning in a storm,
until they vanish and leave me in the darkness
to stare into my own eyes shimmering.
Unblinking, the tears of years well
and flow, emptying in my back pocket.
Save the dreams for later.
#2
That was Beautiful No crit here.
Maybe take the "The" out before salt in the scar.
Write it down.
#3
Quote by Dæmönika
Poem. Moonglade is the reflection of the moon on water.



I walk into the night fearless.
I head towards the lake cluelessly blinded
Doesn't need the second 'I'
may be no need for both 'cluelessly' and 'blinded'
they imply each other

by the self-finding I’m on course to.
An oak branch, thick and scarred,
slaps the moonglade, destroying beauty,
last two words feel a bit too blunt
letting it reform, then destroying it some more;
the salt in the scar.

Fireflies perform acrobatic miracles,
great line
fleeting light shows about my head.
where you put 'fleeting light shows' made it less effective. It's like the 'fleeting light' shows itself, rather than 'fleeting light shows
They intensify, like lightning in a storm,
maybe a better image here
until they vanish and leave me in the darkness
to stare into my own eyes shimmering.
Unblinking, the tears of years well
years is a bit too vague
something more description instead of a blatent rhyme for the sake of it would work better I think
the line break here before the line before is also a bit choppy.
Maybe some more elegant punctuation would work,
it doesn't quite match up to the content

and flow, emptying in my back pocket.
Save the dreams for later.


Overall, it was ruddy good but it could do with a bit of refinement to make the flow and structure add up to the content. Nice piece.
There's only one thing we can do to thwart the plot of these albino shape-shifting lizard BITCHES!