#1
UPDATED: 27 Oct. 2008

ATTACHMENT INCLUDES: GP4, GP5 and Midi Files.

So, I wanted to show people the song I am working on and this song will be recorded immidetly after it is completed and posted as a Demo from my band online.

So, this is the Three-Part Intro and is still a work in progress. I would like to hear peoples opinions on this and as i said this is a work in progress and it is a C4C as long as you let me know what you want me to comment on of your works.

The Three-Part intro is, as it is now, 1 minute and 53 seconds (1:53).
I hope you enjoy it!

-Gulli05
Attachments:
As the Pendulum Falls - Official - Updated 27oct2008.zip
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
Last edited by Gulli05 at Oct 27, 2008,
#2
Decaplets. =\

Bar 36 on marimba was kind of out of place.

The only problem I have with it is that it's quite long and doesn't really go anywhere in that time. It's the same progression through, and basically just toying around on random instruments, no part really stood out and grabbed my attention. That may not have seemed very helpful, but I'd get sick of listening to it over and over for those reasons.

And I will point out that I do listen to 20 minute long songs.
#3
I really liked it, but as Regression said, make something stand out in the intro.
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#4
Thanks for the comments and critiqs. When you say make something stand out, do you mean like using an whole instrument playing through out all the Three-Part intro?

I see what you mean it doesn't go anywhere... well, it is suppose to be kinda like an long Intro (like in a film) and then moves to the song itself.
If you listen to Rhapsody of Fire, the Gargoyles, Angels of Darkness song, it is 20 minutes and the first 2 min or so are only an intro of Acoustic guitar of random playing and then moves to an Acoustic guitar riff.

So Regression, tell me, what should I do to make the intro "more intresting"? Any tips?
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
Last edited by Gulli05 at Oct 4, 2008,
#5
Yes, but I love film scores. The difference is that there is huge contrasts in dynamics and the composers usually manage to create alot of suspense.

Just try have alot of counter melodies going on, make it kind of eerie?

It has a mood going for it at the start yes, and I guess as an intro it would work okay, but just try have something that is unexpected, or just keep working on it. In the end, better song writing might be the difference. Don't be scared to completely redo parts, it can have good results. Just make sure to save all the different versions you do.

If you are going to have a main theme in this song, maybe you could like, have hints of it in the intro. I love it when songs have reccuring themes that come back with lots of different variations, take classical music for example, or Dream Theaters album; Scenes From A Memory. (Yes, more than one song I know, but it demonstrates what I mean)

You may come up with things you think sound good, and you will just be like yeah, this sounds cool. I do all the time, and then when I look back at what I've written, I think yeah that's cool, but it's not amazing. =\

If you really want your music to standout, you can't settle for any less than amazing. Do you think this is the most amazing intro ever? If not, then keep working.
#6
I'm with Regression on the marimba on bar 36. Also I don't think the marimba goes very well in part 3.

I also find that the Synth Strings are very somewhat repetitive. Same with the Pizzicato strings, but the way it is used is very effective. Excellent work on pretty much all the Percussion. Pianos are great addition as well.

Apposed to what the others have said. I don't think its long enough, even though its very slightly repetitive (I do agree with Regression on a sense of direction for the song, not that there isn't any, just needs to be a little more prominent).

Is this going to be a standard song with verses, choruses etc, or an instrumental? It would work both ways I guess, but it would work better as an instrumental I think (as a personal preference).

As to adding to it I think this might be good with a brass section, to give a fuller sound. I would "maybe" consider some background effects. Emphasis on maybe, because it still sounds great without some, and it depends on what effects you would use.

And I don't know why, but vaguely, when I listen to it, I can hear some of Michael Jacksons "Dirty Diana" in there. Strange eh? O-o
#7
Thanks for the comments, I'll try to see if I can fix it and make it... "Awesome!" That is what I am trying to accomplish,making my music awesome. Thanks for the tips and I hoope you give me some more critiqs when it is updated

The synth strings are basically what I use as a background and as is the pizzicato, I use them to get an effect into the intro.

So, should I try to enlenghten the intro, you say? I guess it couldn't hurt trying


Also, I am thinking about including parts which are vocal acting... and having parts with effects such as thunders and wind and all kinds of stuff. So the Guitar pro version might not be showing the whole Score itself.


I am really glad you are ready to give me comments, my friends say this is my best yet and I want to make it better so I am glad to have people that are ready to give tips.
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
Last edited by Gulli05 at Oct 4, 2008,
#8
The ideas were there, but the intro didn't really do much to expand on those ideas. Don't get me wrong, it's a good start, but in the three parts, It really didn't build up in any way. It was kind of repetitive, but then again, it is a long intro
To save an intro being repetitive, try to build up, create an atmosphere amongst the intro that can lead in to the rest of the song.#


It was good, but wasn't amazing. Still needs work.
6/10

►_Eggonesix_◄
Quote by dark&broken
I'd like to see any of those meathead homophobes look a Spartan in the eye and call him a fag.

#9
Quote by eggo_boi_15
The ideas were there, but the intro didn't really do much to expand on those ideas. Don't get me wrong, it's a good start, but in the three parts, It really didn't build up in any way. It was kind of repetitive, but then again, it is a long intro
To save an intro being repetitive, try to build up, create an atmosphere amongst the intro that can lead in to the rest of the song.#


It was good, but wasn't amazing. Still needs work.
6/10

►_Eggonesix_◄



Okey... thanks for the comment. Well, I guess it will sound much better when done


Basically it is changed now and I like it much more
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
Last edited by Gulli05 at Oct 5, 2008,
#10
wow... if you finish this with the same quality as the intro, then my god, it'll be the best thing on here...

interesting with the decaplets i'm liking that

again, with bars 33-36, the marimba is out of time - maybe have that as decaplets too?

also, give the guitars a bit of sustain [leave them hanging and fade them out], cos it'll make it a lot smoother

even though it's an intro, 8/10 =]
#11
Quote by TeraBite
wow... if you finish this with the same quality as the intro, then my god, it'll be the best thing on here...

interesting with the decaplets i'm liking that

again, with bars 33-36, the marimba is out of time - maybe have that as decaplets too?

also, give the guitars a bit of sustain [leave them hanging and fade them out], cos it'll make it a lot smoother

even though it's an intro, 8/10 =]


Thanks, glad you like it.

I Actually think the marimba gives a pretty nice effect. I am gonna fix the guitars and bass.

And yeah, the intro is longer now :P
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
Last edited by Gulli05 at Oct 7, 2008,
#12
What about your last one?

As for this, I'm kinda tired now lol, but I'll edit this post tomorrow with my crit, okay? I'm in the mood for teh epiczorz anyway, and the crits so far seemed interesting, so yeah, I'mma take a look at this later.
#13
Quote by MarchOfEternity
What about your last one?

As for this, I'm kinda tired now lol, but I'll edit this post tomorrow with my crit, okay? I'm in the mood for teh epiczorz anyway, and the crits so far seemed interesting, so yeah, I'mma take a look at this later.


The last one is still in working... I got a well, writers block with that one
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
#14
Okay, as promised, I'm gonna crit this (though in a new post... *cough*increasingpostcounts*cough*)

My first impression of this: Holy crap! That is one of the few things on here I'd actually call epic. Amazing, nice work man!

Okay, so at times it seemed to go nowhere, but I understand that, 'cause it's an intro. It doesn't really have to go anywhere, basically, since imo an exposition is supposed to just build up to the development and theme. I'm sure once it's finished (and provided you did it right ) that feeling of going nowhere would be gone, and this intro would seem logical.

For the pros: almost everything . I liked the decaplet, it gave a sort of contrapuntal rhythm. Niiice.

Now for cons. My main qualm was with the marimba. It just seemed out of place. Now I understand your idea of doing the theme in different pitch, but imo it'd be better if you change the marimba to... I dunno, strings, maybe? Or brass? Also, the guitars could use some fade in and fade out.

That's about it, really. Great intro, I must say. If you ever gotten around to continue and finish this (or the last one, for that matter), drop me a PM if it's not too much of a trouble, okay?
#15
Pretty good intro, great when the guitar enters, though I'd like it if you didn't make it go back to the orchestral but rather continue with the guitar (what I'm saying is, drop the guitar entering until part III)
#16
March of Eternity, this means a lot to me to here that this is one of the feq you would call Epic on UG. I have changed the marimba to another instrument now and I like it better.
I will definantly let you know when it is done, or when the Rise of the Dark Angel is done

Zeroxk, the thing is this is an Symphonic Metal piece which will likely be some 10-20 minutes and this is like this cause the Intro is part 1 of the song. But thanks for the critiq.
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
#17
I'm with the others on this one. In the beginning I thought it was really cool but by the time I got to bar 46 I it was getting annoying since there wasn't anything significant added to the first 3 chord progression.

still it shows great promise . do you have any plans to post the full gp5 once the song is finished? I would love to hear it.
#18
Quote by gutsman
I'm with the others on this one. In the beginning I thought it was really cool but by the time I got to bar 46 I it was getting annoying since there wasn't anything significant added to the first 3 chord progression.

still it shows great promise . do you have any plans to post the full gp5 once the song is finished? I would love to hear it.

Thanks for the comment, I would upload the newer version I got of this but as I don't have it at my laptop I can't. This has changed a bit. Part III is a bit diffrent to, it kinda Builds-Up to a Riff A part which is the beginning of the second chapter in the song.

It will be posted as an completed GP file, midi and an recorded audio Demo from my band.
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
Last edited by Gulli05 at Oct 9, 2008,
#19
I really really liked the powerful voice that this has when Intro III begins. It just sounds epic. The first to parts are not quite as effective, but they have an interesting effect and I like the symphonic ties this has. It definitely has potential to develop into something great, it just needs a little bit of fine tuning with the timing and it is set. Keep working on this one for sure! I look forward to hearing more for this piece.
#20
Quote by FFDP_Metal_Head
I really really liked the powerful voice that this has when Intro III begins. It just sounds epic. The first to parts are not quite as effective, but they have an interesting effect and I like the symphonic ties this has. It definitely has potential to develop into something great, it just needs a little bit of fine tuning with the timing and it is set. Keep working on this one for sure! I look forward to hearing more for this piece.


Thanks man, I am glad you like it. As it is, I am now working on the second chapter of the song.
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
#22
Quote by deathmetallover
Very eerie and atmospheric. Love it
Very powerful when the guitars came in.
Part 3 was awesome man, loved the combination of all the instruments and the addition of new ones.
Can't wait to here it recorded.


Hey there, thanks for the comment, actually part 3 has changed a little, I think it is even better now.

I am glad you like it!
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
#23
UPDATED!, Note thou that what is found in there might change later on as I continue working on this!
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
#24
ooh, much fuller =D

listening again, critting as i go

ok, i prefered the marimba or whatever you had first, it was a lot sharper

bar 36, i would try and get the synth voice in time with the decuplet strings, so maybe pentuplets? [am i right on that? lol]

ah good, you've faded out the guitars, sounds a lot smoother

i wouldn't repeat the first part again, it makes it too long and gets a little boring [no offence, this stuff's fooking amazing =D]

next bit, i preferred the choir with what that did. the triplet strings make it sound awkward - with a section like this, you need something good and beaty you can headbang to

nice bit here, nothing wrong with it

from bar 118, continue that riff on the keyboards but fade it out


that's all i can think of atm, sounds damn good still

8/10
#25
Quote by TeraBite
ooh, much fuller =D

listening again, critting as i go

ok, i prefered the marimba or whatever you had first, it was a lot sharper

bar 36, i would try and get the synth voice in time with the decuplet strings, so maybe pentuplets? [am i right on that? lol]

ah good, you've faded out the guitars, sounds a lot smoother

i wouldn't repeat the first part again, it makes it too long and gets a little boring [no offence, this stuff's fooking amazing =D]

next bit, i preferred the choir with what that did. the triplet strings make it sound awkward - with a section like this, you need something good and beaty you can headbang to

nice bit here, nothing wrong with it

from bar 118, continue that riff on the keyboards but fade it out


that's all i can think of atm, sounds damn good still

8/10


Thanks for the comment and critiq, we'll see what I change, I'll have to talk to the band, about ideas and such Thanks man!
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
#26
very nice man! is it finished? or is there more cause it seemed way to short other all the build up with the intro's
"We carry death out of the village!"
#27
Quote by Marskell
very nice man! is it finished? or is there more cause it seemed way to short other all the build up with the intro's


Nope, I am still working on this, I have been having a writers block for quite some time
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
#28
this ranks all the way up there with my fav bands EVER. do u have a link to ur band's myspace/website/whatever? i wanna add u

EDIT: I agree with TeraBite. play that keyboard thing from 118 on, it would sound absolutely epic

DOUBLEEDIT: Do you have a name for this album yet?
Hell has a 2-for-1 deal and i'm inviting you!

IT'S TIME TO TAKE THE TIME!


We're all waiting
For something

A whisper of silence
A reflection of darkness

Something lost to be found
Last edited by hauntu4ever at Mar 21, 2009,
#29
Quote by hauntu4ever
this ranks all the way up there with my fav bands EVER. do u have a link to ur band's myspace/website/whatever? i wanna add u

EDIT: I agree with TeraBite. play that keyboard thing from 118 on, it would sound absolutely epic

DOUBLEEDIT: Do you have a name for this album yet?


I had a myspace but it is outdated and needs to be fixed a lot because the name of my project has changed and also I haven't had any full song (which I have completely created to the extent that I want to record it yet).
I have been having a lot of writers block this year so I have been mostly working on my guitar techniques and studying orchestral music a bit.

Sorry there is no album name but the band/project is called Aeon's Edge.

But hey - Just add me as a friend here on UG and leave a comment in my profiles to remind me of giving you the myspace when it has been fixed and stuff.
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
#30
Quote by Gulli05
I had a myspace but it is outdated and needs to be fixed a lot because the name of my project has changed and also I haven't had any full song (which I have completely created to the extent that I want to record it yet).
I have been having a lot of writers block this year so I have been mostly working on my guitar techniques and studying orchestral music a bit.

Sorry there is no album name but the band/project is called Aeon's Edge.

But hey - Just add me as a friend here on UG and leave a comment in my profiles to remind me of giving you the myspace when it has been fixed and stuff.


okai, i'll go do that now. thanks!
Hell has a 2-for-1 deal and i'm inviting you!

IT'S TIME TO TAKE THE TIME!


We're all waiting
For something

A whisper of silence
A reflection of darkness

Something lost to be found
#31
Quote by hauntu4ever
okai, i'll go do that now. thanks!


Might be some time till I get these things done bu there will be eventually a good myspace and some demos of my songs online (Hopefully I can work on this a lot this summer).
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
#32
Quote by Gulli05
Might be some time till I get these things done bu there will be eventually a good myspace and some demos of my songs online (Hopefully I can work on this a lot this summer).


alright, i'll check then

listening to the song again using the gp5 format and switching between melodies to keep the melody onscreen (), i noticed there's kind of a sharp transition between the pizzicato strings and Ensemble Strings at 77. do you think you can fade them in and out? i tried testing it on my tuxguitar, but the pizzicato strings ate up the ensemble strings as i added the fade
Hell has a 2-for-1 deal and i'm inviting you!

IT'S TIME TO TAKE THE TIME!


We're all waiting
For something

A whisper of silence
A reflection of darkness

Something lost to be found
#33
Quote by hauntu4ever
alright, i'll check then

listening to the song again using the gp5 format and switching between melodies to keep the melody onscreen (), i noticed there's kind of a sharp transition between the pizzicato strings and Ensemble Strings at 77. do you think you can fade them in and out? i tried testing it on my tuxguitar, but the pizzicato strings ate up the ensemble strings as i added the fade


I'll check it out.
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X
#34
Quote by Gulli05
I'll check it out.


Hell has a 2-for-1 deal and i'm inviting you!

IT'S TIME TO TAKE THE TIME!


We're all waiting
For something

A whisper of silence
A reflection of darkness

Something lost to be found
#35
ooh, i haven't listened to this in a while, and it's been updated =D

my only crits are:

bars 92-107, change the guitars to triplets so it flows a bit better

bar 112, track 7, the "let ring" riff does fit, sounds to mucky?

overall, sounds pretty awesome, 8/10
#36
Quote by TeraBite
ooh, i haven't listened to this in a while, and it's been updated =D

my only crits are:

bars 92-107, change the guitars to triplets so it flows a bit better

bar 112, track 7, the "let ring" riff does fit, sounds to mucky?

overall, sounds pretty awesome, 8/10


i'm not sure what u mean about the part on bar 112, track 7, but ok

also, i was wrong about the sharp transition, at least on the MIDI. the gp5 makes it sharp, the midi fades it. i'm not sure which is right, but that's what i hear
Hell has a 2-for-1 deal and i'm inviting you!

IT'S TIME TO TAKE THE TIME!


We're all waiting
For something

A whisper of silence
A reflection of darkness

Something lost to be found
#37
Thanks guys! Will take a look at this sometime soon. (When I have time to sit down at home in front of guitar pro)
"Fly with me forever high
And with these wings
We'll set the world on fire
Fly with me through scorching skies
You and I - The lie of lies"

-Symphony X