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#1
Well, Back in gr.7 I had to read in front of the entire school our "School Prayer" And when I got up to the microphone I thought to myself, Wouldn't this be the worst time to get an erection? And sure enough Jonny boy jumps to the occasion, I stood in front of the entire school with an erection for 45 seconds... I swear, My voice cracked 40 times because of fear <.<

Post your stories!
GEAR

Ibanez RG 420 CM

Line 6 Spider III
#2
Right before a presentation to the class


Quote by Våd Hamster
Find a dice and assign a number to each girl. Throw the dice.


The number you hope for at the moment you throw the dice, is the one you'll want to keep.
#4
One time this kid went up in front of the whole school to lead us for our school prayer and he popped the wimpiest boner you'll ever see in your life. He was literally standing there for the better part of a minute praying that no one would notice while the whole school was trying to contain their laughter.
#6
Quote by Doppelgänger
When I was having sex. It was the weirdest thing.


I'm lying, I've never had sex.



hahaha your a virgin!?!?




Quote by Våd Hamster
Find a dice and assign a number to each girl. Throw the dice.


The number you hope for at the moment you throw the dice, is the one you'll want to keep.
#7
Quote by RU Experienced?
One time this kid went up in front of the whole school to lead us for our school prayer and he popped the wimpiest boner you'll ever see in your life. He was literally standing there for the better part of a minute praying that no one would notice while the whole school was trying to contain their laughter.

Oh really! Man that totally happened to me this one time omg it was horri-

Asshole
GEAR

Ibanez RG 420 CM

Line 6 Spider III
#8
I try to make it noticeable when I get one.

Nothing's wrong with a good ol' erection during a class presentation. It makes it more humorous.
The best thing about life is knowing you put it together
#10
Well I was on a date I was battling my penis to stay down. It sucked.
Due what you want as long as you vote Due!
#12
Quote by Doppelgänger
When I was having sex. It was the weirdest thing.


I'm lying, I've never had sex.


+1 to you, funny sir.

I'd rather die than go to heaven.

Quote by Chris.Rock.Art
I like you and you are special



Quote by perry589
I don't wank. I auto fellatio.



#13
Quote by MetalMegaMan
I try to make it noticeable when I get one.

Nothing's wrong with a good ol' erection during a class presentation. It makes it more humorous.

All fun and games until some gets blinded, eh?
#14
Quote by Iceman 420
All fun and games until some gets blinded, eh?


The best thing about life is knowing you put it together
#17
Quote by RU Experienced?
I don't think I have any great stories but it's always awkward at the pool/beach when he's got nowhere to hide.

+1

I was about to say that.
#18
Quote by gnomieowns
a pit classic.

while with grandparents maybe? not good.


haha yeh thats bad but not as bad getting one while hugging your grandparents...
Quote by Cobain_Is_King
There's this cool shop in Auckland called Google. It has everything.


oh look, the have a website: www.google.com
#19
I think the worst time to get a stiffy is probably when your little niece/nephew/brother/sister/son/daughter is sitting in your lap...


Unless, you're into that sorta thing.
D=
I'd rather die than go to heaven.

Quote by Chris.Rock.Art
I like you and you are special



Quote by perry589
I don't wank. I auto fellatio.



#20
ragin87 did you happen to go to heiskell school? I highly doubt it, but then again I highly doubt many people have gotten boners reading the school prayer in 7th grade as well...
#21
Quote by RU Experienced?
I don't think I have any great stories but it's always awkward at the pool/beach when he's got nowhere to hide.


I have a phobia of swimming for this reason.
#22
While I was being examined by a doctor...


You know for my junk and stuff.


That was kinda embarassing.

I imagine it would be worse if you were having some sort of procedure though- like a vasectomy. That could get messy. Bloody jizz everywhere
#23
Worst time is when you don't have a penis. I mean, my god, here I am, sitting and minding my own business, then BAM! I had my nephew in my lap, must've flung him AT LEAST six feet across the room.
#24
Quote by thanksgiving
hahaha your a virgin!?!?



haha

Made my night.
ok, yeah. my name is silly because I signed up when I was 13.

BEDBUGS
#25
When i was at the park and this really hot chick was walking buy and i had on some basketball short(you know the mess one that u cant even hid a phone in you pocket) but luckily i was setting at a table
Equipment

Guitar
- Jackson DKMG DINKY(EMG 81/85)
- Ibanez S5470 Prestige(Air Classic/FS-1/D sonic)

Amp
- Randall RX120RH and RX412 Half Stack

Effects
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#26
Quote by Iceman 420
Worst time is when you don't have a penis. I mean, my god, here I am, sitting and minding my own business, then BAM! I had my nephew in my lap, must've flung him AT LEAST six feet across the room.


hahahaha

the mental image



The best thing about life is knowing you put it together
#28
When you are with your gf AND her parents

EDIT: Or when it happens just randomly for no reason at church. Now THAT'S embarrassing
Quote by necrosis1193
As usual Natrone's mouth spouts general win.

Quote by Silverstein14
man, Natrone you're some kind of ninja I swear


Quote by gregs1020
plexi


i realize the longshot that is. little giant to humongous one.


Rest In Peace Stevie Ray
#29
one time i had a boner in 7th grade gym class and everyone was standing but i was sitting down cuz i was trying to hide it, so the teacher gets angry at me and starts yelling at me to stand up. by the time i stood up everyone was just staring at my boner
#30
Quote by MetalMegaMan
hahahaha

the mental image




Awesome, someone who finds me funneh on teh interwebz.

For that sir, you get an E-Cookie.
#31
When I was looking at porn with my mom we both got one.


Wait what??
Gear:
Schecter Hellraiser Deluxe
Boss DS-1
Crate GTD65

GAS List:
Mesa Boogie Dual Rectifier Roadster
#32
Quote by guy_tebache
While I was being examined by a doctor...


You know for my junk and stuff.


I also hate physical exams for this reason. My only strategy is to look straight upwards as they play examine it, as there is NO way I would be able to contain myself if I SAW them touch it. (female doctor by the way).
#33
Right after school, me and this chick were "close" and then she had to go, so as i was walking away my freakin 2nd block teacher decides to ask me about my grades and stuff, i knew she knew, it was horrible.
Then there's the times at church....THOSE SUCK!
You cool man?
#34
Quote by guy_tebache
While I was being examined by a doctor...


You know for my junk and stuff.


That was kinda embarassing.
I disagree sir. Last time I got a physical done they had me sitting in my drafty little gown in a freezing room for what seemed like an eternity and when the doctor came to check everything out it looked like a frightened naked mole rat was taking cover from a huge storm.

Bastard was trying to pop my nuts between his thumb and pointer like they were grapes
#35
The worst I could possibly imagine happened to a kid I knew. In 8th grade this kid won the state championship for wrestling to during a pep assembly he came out in his wrestling tights and held his trophy above his head... sure enough he had a boner. He must have known but not given a shit because he was parading around in the tights for a while...
#36
Quote by RU Experienced?

Bastard was trying to pop my nuts between his thumb and pointer like they were grapes


ew....
Gear:
Schecter Hellraiser Deluxe
Boss DS-1
Crate GTD65

GAS List:
Mesa Boogie Dual Rectifier Roadster
#37
Quote by Fandubidable
Then there's the times at church....THOSE SUCK!

+ 124317824074903871092387438907109234

The worst part about it is I never have ANY IDEA why my friend suddenly decided to wake up!
Quote by necrosis1193
As usual Natrone's mouth spouts general win.

Quote by Silverstein14
man, Natrone you're some kind of ninja I swear


Quote by gregs1020
plexi


i realize the longshot that is. little giant to humongous one.


Rest In Peace Stevie Ray
#38
Quote by ratmblink123
haha

Made my night.





Quote by Våd Hamster
Find a dice and assign a number to each girl. Throw the dice.


The number you hope for at the moment you throw the dice, is the one you'll want to keep.
#39
Quote by RU Experienced?
One time this kid went up in front of the whole school to lead us for our school prayer and he popped the wimpiest boner you'll ever see in your life. He was literally standing there for the better part of a minute praying that no one would notice while the whole school was trying to contain their laughter.




Dont you people get tired of using this same joke over and over...

BTW, cant you guys hide it? Just push her down straight, unless you've got a raging one haha.
#40
Quote by boris6389
ragin87 did you happen to go to heiskell school? I highly doubt it, but then again I highly doubt many people have gotten boners reading the school prayer in 7th grade as well...

Nah lol. Im from Saskatchewan.
GEAR

Ibanez RG 420 CM

Line 6 Spider III
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