#1
Hey, this is my first song that i've posted here so tell me what you think and i'm happy to crit anyone elses songs back
Cheers.
Attachments:
New song.zip
My finger's on the pulse
(but where's the beat?)
#2
That pedal point stuff in the intro is awesome. Just a great opening riff.

The verse is cool too, but I find that the beat is getting lost at times. Specifically the E octave thing, and the A7 chord. Personally I would alter the drums during those bars just to put some emphasis on the beat, maybe a shot to the hihat each beat, maybe alter the kick drum, maybe do something with the snare, whatever. But up until that point in the song it's very easy to feel the groove, then the groove breaks during that bar and jumps back in, only to break again a few bars later. Doing it once and a while is okay, but it's just happening too often so it kind of prevents the whole verse section from flowing properly.

The exact same thing happens in the chorus when you do that cool little riff. The pause on the drum breaks the flow of the chorus, so maybe use some kind of interesting drum fill or something like that. Also I'd have the bass playing during those bars as well.

Also, I think that little drum fill thing you do on the E5 should only happen at the end of the solo as a way to bridge back into the verse.

I think with pauses like those, you want to use them sparingly and as a way to build up to a more powerful part.

The little break you do after the second chorus isn't good. First, I think you should make it an A5 chord instead of just an open A hit. I also think you should add the bass in after no more than 4 bars. You could either have it echoing the guitar line, or you could have it do some kind of funky solo thing, or I would have it play the guitars line, while you do a guitar solo, or you could move up the neck on guitar and fool around with some A based doublestops, A5, Asus2, Asus4, A7 some kind of neat little vamp. Or, you could kind of return to that pedal point idea that you presented in the intro, and do something like that on the A string while sticking with the rhythm you set up.

I like the thing you're doing on the ride cymbal when you bring the drums in, I kinda thing it'd be a cool thing to do a 4 bar mini drum solo right before you go into the next section. If not a solo, I would bring the snare and kick back in 4 bars earlier than you do. That would just help build the next section.

Next section is fine, the straight 8th note rhythms could use a little spicing up rhythmically but other than that it works. The pause just before the chorus is a good thing (although I'd put a shot on the crash cymbal when you hit the last chord to emphasize the pause).

Other than that, it ends a little abruptly, either think about having it slowly fade out, or just add a big held A5 chord, with some crash shots to end the whole thing.

You also might thing about adding a second guitar in. You could try using it to keep the idea you established during the intro going throughout the song, and a guitar solo can never hurt this kind of song. The real trick would be to avoid having the second guitar playing too much.

Lots of crit I know, but don't take it as a negative as I certainly wouldn't have bothered to type all this if I thought your song sucked

Anyway, if you wanna crit back my songs are linked in my sig.