#1
This is a song I wrote a few months back for a special girl in my life. It's basically a slow love song, partly balady. If I have to pick any song it's like in terms of sound and song structure it would be Wish You Were Here, where the emotion is expressed mostly by the guitar, with the lyrics as a backing force, driving the point forward. With that in mind, please read and comment, and I will do the same.


If You Only Knew

(Long (1-2 minute long), very slow guitar intro)

The night is lonely,
When you are not here,
There is only one thing I want,
And it’s you to be near

I just want to hold you,
To be mine,
Darling if you only knew,
Darling just give me a sign,

(Instrumental)

Every day I look at you,
Every day I see you,
Every day I need you,
Darling, if you only knew.
#2
There's not much to critique here. Its good. I think for next time you shouldn't mention anything about the actual song as to how you want it to play out just so people can try to critique it with an open mind.

It's good for what you're trying to do with it though-

Goodwork