#1
I've been seeing a lot of story threads that pop up. Then die within a few hours. So I took the liberty of Making THE story thread. Post any kind of story. Mine happens to be a cop chase. But it can be anything. I want this thread to be full of epic storys, so try not to post unless you have one. Although if you want to say something don't hesitate. So here goes.... before I start though, Yes I deserve the cop running after me, Don't criticize, just kick back and read a good cop chase story.

So my friend Jake is visiting my town and staying the night, all that goodness. We were bored as **** so we went and bought a halfer of some Grey Kush. Anyways we came back to this gated community (Golf Course) my friend lives at. We pulled up and parked in this dark parking lot. It didn't take long to meet up with my older brother and a good friend of mine, Kyle, that stole a crate of fiji water from his work. We start lighting the bong up. Taking massive rips, when we had a great Idea. Lets get some golf clubs and start hitting the full water bottles everywhere!

We start ****ing around with the bottles of water, throwing em at each other. Hitting them with golf clubs. Just getting water everywhere. Were about 4 bowls in when we see a pair of head lights coming down the road that leads to us. I've dealt with cops for a while now. And once you memorize a cops front end. You never forget what it looks like.

So all three of us book it up a hill to the golf greens (my bro was on the other side of the street so he got away scott free) Now I'm pretty ****ed up so I hit the deck and go prone once I'm at the top. I was thinking I was a soldier or some shit getting ready to ambush some poor guy. When it sinks in. Wait a sec, Thats a mother ****ing cop getting out of his car! I immediately get up, and spring down the field.

If you've ever ran on a golf course at night. It ****s with your eyes. You dont know if your running up hill or down hill, Your constantly thinking your gonna trip and fall on your face. Plus the pot made it very difficult.

Anyways, I've run from the cops before (nothing even close as to how epic this story gets) Rule #1 of running from the cops. DONT LOOK BEHIND YOU. So I never glanced. All three of us ran about 300 yards. Were not in the best of shape (I would have been caught if I hadn't started working out earlier) so we stop behind a tree to regain our breath. And to see if the cop was still behind us.

It was Deathly quite as we all held our breath. A few deafening silent moments passed. And as we began to think "Well that was easy"... faint sound began to reach our ears. A slight "cha-ching Cha-Ching CHA-CHING!". It grew in volume as a dark figure began making its way toward us. Mother****er snuck up on us!!!!!!!

We didnt even look at each other as we instantly started sprinting again. My friend Kyle broke off from us thinking he'd go after two guys instead of one. Keep in mind this Cop has no night vision what so ever. We had been outside for at least 30 minuets so our vision was completely adjusted. He was relying on his mag light.

I keep running, full speed ahead. For 5 minuets I hear his keys rattling (Cha-ching!) as he ran after us. Till a HUGE thump resounded through the air. My friend Jake and I look back. The Cop fell straight on his face. We seriously stop, savor this moment (There's just no way you can pass that up, its worth getting arrested to see a cop fall head first) then resume running the second he stumbles up. (BEST PART OF THE STORY)

Finally I stop hearing his keys as I slow down. We see this fork in the golf cart road that we were following. We go right since Right is always right (right?)

My asthma is flaring up (plus the pot was rough as **** cause we got in the whole "I can take a bigger hit than you" game) but I'm a beast and I'm steadying my breathing. As we rounded the corner though. We hit a spiked gate leading to the street. Our terror spikes to an all new high, its to tall. So we do the only sensible thing to do. We hid spoon style behind the only tree there was.

The cop rounded the corner, looked for us with his light. He shined the light at our tree, but it was barely big enough to hide us. I'm hearing that conbine radio going off as I imagine him ready to beat me with a stun stick (kudo's whoever knows the reference) I see his head turn as he quickly shined his light across the field (prolly a good 100 yards) and there in the distance. a small chubby figure is running as fast as he can toward the street. It was seriously horror film status. He was right there. But my bud Kyle came the rescue as the cop begins to run after him. We stand there uncomfortably waiting for the the retreating figure in blue.

The second we see him get about 50-75 feet away. We jump up and go around the corner we should have taken the first time. Jake and I hit the main road and start walking to my friends house. We again resume our run when all of a sudden. A familiar blue LED head lights of squad car comes down the road.

Obviously we cant keep running or else they'd be like "well shit, That was easy...". So we stop and start walking. Like were two old guys out for a midnight stroll. I smile at him, wave and say "Officer" kind of like a greeting. He nods and continues driving. When two more come down. This point were freaking out in our heads. We follow the road another good 10 yards till it kinda curves out of view from where they drove off to.

Jake turns to me and is like "Kevin we should probably pick up the pace now..." I was already ahead of him as I started a good healthy run again. WHEN ANOTHER pair of headlights come barreling down the road. I'm in the middle of the road, I look left to Jake as like a "What do we do?" Hes a bonafide bad ass, much more so than myself so he kinda became like the leader. Bitch was already gone! so I dash to this hedge and crouch down like a gargoyle. I'm dead still hoping they wont see me. the car rolls by, turns out to be an old guy driving a beamer. he looks at me like "0.o wtf?"

I didnt move cause its like "Well now what... Keep doing what I'm doing!"

He drives outta view and I spring back to life out of my statue frame. I immediately start jogging in the street as I see Jake jump out of some tree. Hes like 6'5 so it was kind of a funny sight. He comes sprinting over to me gasping "Stop.....Running...."

My body is burning now. We've had to had run at least a mile and a half now. (I LUCKED out big time) I'm wearing some old Army woodland BDU pants. With a black jacket and combat boots. just cause, The whole Get up was kind of heavy. But I'd be in jail if it werent for that out fit So I have no desire to keep running. At this point, were near the entrance of the Gated community.

We see FOUR! FOUR MORE COPS! come cruising in. So Jake and I start pulling some serious Splinter cell moves. I began hiding under cars, behind bushes. That sort of thing as we leap frogged through the neighborhood. It was mostly likely not nearly as awesome as I'm telling it since I was pretty damn high. But it seemed glorious at the time that we evaded the cops as well as we had. Eventually we make it to Kyles house.

But we couldn't go inside! We kinda thought to ourselves. It's 1:00 in the morning. His parents are home. And Kyle wasn't with us. That would be weird. So we sat on the side of his house. His bathroom was right behind us, kinda raised off the ground. a small window connected the outside where we were to bathroom. 30 minuets passed. We started hearing thumping noises inside the house. We heard the bathroom door open. Kyles dad walked in, without turning around. Humming to himself as he zipped down and began to relieve himself. He began talking to himself like "Oooooh damn... there aint nothing better...."

He zipped it up washed his hands and walked back toward the living room I presume. without ever looking behind him.

For another 22 minuets, we stood. No noise. No movement. When a cop car pulls up in front of the house. Were thinking "Oh shit Kyle got caught! Hes getting dropped off!" Turns out its a pissed off persistent cop (Probably the one that fell ). Seriously hunting us down. He just chills in his car for about 15 minuets. I faintly hear him receive a dispatch call. He starts up the car and finally drives away. We think were scotch free, but no. We hear the dreaded foot steps of boots approaching....

But a resounding thump goes off. a very familiar and distinct voice starts swearing "**** twat ****!" Underneath their voice but still loud enough to know it prolly really hurt Someone else is trying their damn hardest not to laugh. Turn out to be my bro and kyle. Kyle walked into a protruding roof beam. We all walk around the house and inside where we retell the story to each other 50x over. Hearing each others side of it as we break out the jager to celebrate a good night of evasion.

The cops got us back by opening the car, Stealing the bong and the weed... That one definitely stung. They also took the cloves I got from Canada. It made me cry a little. But it was a small price to pay for a good cop chase.

So share! It can be anything!
Quote by kranoscorp
I find that I feel the same about women who play bass as I think of immigrants in America.

I respect them for finding a place in society under a lot of ridicule, but I have an odd paranoia that they are going to steal my job.
#4
Quote by InvaderTSN
I was hoping to get Bel-Aired, to be honest.


Every detail in that story is true. How could you want Bel-Air over that? I wont deny The Fresh Prince is one sexy beast. But I dont think he can top that.
Quote by kranoscorp
I find that I feel the same about women who play bass as I think of immigrants in America.

I respect them for finding a place in society under a lot of ridicule, but I have an odd paranoia that they are going to steal my job.
#5
i just lost my boner seeing all those words
sex, drugs, and rock and roll have turned into aids, needles, and techno..
#6
This one time, I came into this thread and read a long story about a stoner with asthma, then I got bored and left to play guitar.

It was epic.
Do you feel warm within your cage?

And have you figured out yet -


Life goes by?
Quote by Hydra150
There's a dick on Earth, too
It's you
#7
Quote by strat0blaster
This one time, I came into this thread and read a long story about a stoner with asthma, then I got bored and left to play guitar.

It was epic.


I'm not really sure how to respond, that's kinda mean. That story took hella time and work to write.
Quote by kranoscorp
I find that I feel the same about women who play bass as I think of immigrants in America.

I respect them for finding a place in society under a lot of ridicule, but I have an odd paranoia that they are going to steal my job.
#10
All that running and you STILL got caught.

~don't finkdinkle when ur supposed to be dimpdickin~
#13
Quote by Primus2112
All that running and you STILL got caught.



0.o we didnt get caught. Dicks stole my bong and weed though :* (. I stupidly left the car locked except for my driver side. I manually unlocked it to put my stuff away. I didnt remember to lock it again cause a water bottle hit me in the side of the head It hurt then, but it was funny later.
Quote by kranoscorp
I find that I feel the same about women who play bass as I think of immigrants in America.

I respect them for finding a place in society under a lot of ridicule, but I have an odd paranoia that they are going to steal my job.
#14
Well, you kind of got caught.
~don't finkdinkle when ur supposed to be dimpdickin~
#16
Quote by Primus2112
Well, you kind of got caught.


Yeah that's true actually. It was pure dumb luck that we didnt go to jail though. On one hand. That was one of the best experiences I have ever had. But I'm not to keen on trying to imitate it again.

Actually it'd be pretty cool if they made a National Day Even where cops would have to chase people down once a year. Kinda like a big tag game. But ya didnt go to the slammer after wards >.>
Quote by kranoscorp
I find that I feel the same about women who play bass as I think of immigrants in America.

I respect them for finding a place in society under a lot of ridicule, but I have an odd paranoia that they are going to steal my job.
#17
Cool idea! My friend's dad is a cop. He'd probably do that for my friends and me.

I should ask him...
~don't finkdinkle when ur supposed to be dimpdickin~
#19
HAHAHHA

"and there in the distance. a small chubby figure is running as fast as he can toward the street"

He began talking to himself like "Oooooh damn... there aint nothing better...."

They also took the cloves I got from Canada. It made me cry a little.


****in hilarious dude