#1
im pretty new to all this lyric writing jazz and was hoping for a little bit of help.
this is basicly a song about me and an old friend growing apart but cant think where else to take it


wheres the little boy with the broken smile
hes changed so much in such a little while
remember when we were all the best of freinds
and our summer breaks never seemed to end


but wheres it all gone now that we've grown
obsessed with money and the things that we own
never happy with the things that we have
what i wouldnt give to bring them summers back
#2
Wow..all that seems to spring to mind, its very impressive, I really like it, consistently holds with the tone that yous trying to set and overall a very strongly structured little piece, as I've said I like it..so it's getting a thumbs up from me!! well done.

If you could..maybe you could check out the link in my sig to crit the song in there, any comments on it would be greatly appreciated.