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Today I played a bass that was missing two tone knobs, and the volume knob was stuck at half way. Also, even though the bass was in tune, the intonation was so off that some notes were out of pitch by a full semitone.

And you?
Maybe the owner misheard that you play with a pick for "play with a brick"?

That's why you should stick to fingers.

The only problems I've had is from them being cheap.
Metal Forum Popular Vote Winner!!!

Quote by webbtje
Quote by dead-fish
And you're obviously here because you fancy Phill.
Phill is a very attractive guy...

"I'm so tempted to sig that, Phill" - Sig it then

Unless otherwise stated, assume everything I say is in my opinion.
I once played a bass that had been sitting in a tool shed for the greater part of the last 10 years. It had been rained on and subject to the intense bursts of heat and cold that texas weather is known for. THe volume and tone knobs were rusted in place and the input jack was rusted in place as well. The frets were in surprisingly good shape but the neck on a whole was shaped very similar to a banana. I decided to get a pair of pliers and sand down the input jack to see if it could still make a connection and put out any type of sound at all. When I worked on it, it did put out a sound but it was nothing more than different pitches of really whacked out static. I bought it off the guy anyway for 5$ and took it home. I made it look presentable and put it up in my kitchen for decor. It just looks like an old bass now.
The worst bass I've ever played?
a P bass clone that my school has had hanging up in a cupboard for over 10 years. the E tuner is so stiff you can't change it, and it's been detuned to get anything out of it. You can't play anything on it.
I'm a Fire, and I'll Burn.Burn.Burn.
A Brownsville bass for $99. It was way too neck-heavy, and when I hit a Dm powerchord on the D and G strings, the A rattled. ????? ????
An old abused 1972 Fender Jazz bass with an action a lapsteel would be proud of
Washburn RB2500 (5 String)
Yamaha BB400 Fretless (1981)
Carlo Giordano 3/4 Upright (White)
Cort Action 4 (Stereo-fied)
Orange Bass Terror 500
Orange 1x15 Cab
Boss GT-6 Bass Multi-effects
Quote by slap-a-bass
my first bass....action was |........................................| like that

The action on my Warwick Corvette was like that when it arrived.
Quote by NeverMIA
Epi T-Bird

And why would that be?

Worst for me was a standard Jazz at a local music store. the neck was something like this --> (

and it was tuned to C standard. Honestly, my Squier was set up better when I got it.
Quote by WyvernOmega

TL;DR: Saw a girl at Wal-Mart, she started feeling me up, I jizzed in my pants.

Shit, I'm so pathetic.

[quote="'[BurnTheDusk"]']I agree, tone does sound better the closer your genitals are to the ground.


It was a Gothic Epiphone Thunderbird
All I want is for everyone to go to hell...
...It's the last place I was seen before I lost myself

Quote by DisarmGoliath
You can be the deputy llamma of the recordings forum!
Squier Pete Wentz P Bass. High action, no versatility, crap hardwar, and sounds like a fart.
Schecter Stiletto Studio 5
Ibanez SRX2EX1
Gallien Krueger 1001rbii
Gallien Krueger Neo 410
My friends old P-bass rip-off.. The back of the neck was more sticky than the floor at the movie theater. It has LAYERS of stickers and perm. marker written all over in graffiti style. You can't touch the volume knob or else you get intense static and feedback. The strings are years old, and sound like tapers. My friend still has it in his garage somewhere lol....
Quote by breakdown123
Is there such a thing as a heavy riff with out chugging on the e string?
A Peavey Foundation at a pawn shop...the poor thing was missing a string and detuned horribly, and STILL had amazingly high action. Pretty beat up frets, bare wood showing through chips in the paint, rust hardware, etc...

It was selling for $250.
Nope, no sig here.
A Dan-electro bass that had 15 frets and only 3 strings on it. The pick-up was like a lipstick pick-up and the wiring had gone to hell... it didn't come back, it froze over and corroded.

EDIT: I forgot to mention, there was gold foil as shielding in the electronics compartment.

The body was also made out of what appeared to be a door off of a standard kids room in a house from the 80's.

Needless to say it was the best bass I've ever played, it made me happy mentally.
Epi Gothic Thunderbird
Squier P-Bass w/new pups
Ibanez RG7321
Washburn Acoustic Guitar

POD X3 Live $300/500.
Quote by ChemicalFire
It was a Gothic Epiphone Thunderbird

Why, yes it was lol. Heaviest bass I have ever picked up. Barely played it 5 minutes.
Never Missing in Action
my first bass was a bass my dad found in the trashcan coming home for work one day. i put strings on it and still play it. The action is about 1.5" above fret at 12th. no pickups, and tuners rattle with a nice metal twang whenever i tought the string. i love that thing
'85 Fender Reissue '75 Jazz Bass ---> Ashdown MAG300h
Schecter C/SH-1 ---> Fender Hot Rod Deluxe
Probably my old seven-string fretless acoustic bass with insulting string spacing. Sold it for twice the amount I paid and then some.
Quote by Cody_Grey102
I was looking at a used Warwick Vampyre LTD 5'er for about $200. I went home to grab my wallet and came back and some jerk with an epic beard got it already..
A rogue violin bass. Horrible action and the sound was like it was a shoe box strung with rubber bands.
a Warwick $$ at guitar center.

Somebody turned the knobs a bit to far, they would just spin and spin with no stopping point.
A home-made acoustic bass converted from a regular acoustic guitar. God it was awful. The strings were atleast an inch off the fret board.
An old encore p bass with a bowed neck so the action was somewere unknown. Also there was a huge crack down the back of it.
Yamaha TRB1006
Fender MIA jazz bass
Hora Hybrid double bass
Hartke lh 500
Ev 606L
Epiphone les paul
A Wesley 5string in translucent pink... halfway through playing it (and it was even worse than i'd expected, for the record) the strap screw came spinning out of it's hole at about 100mph, and with nothing now to hold it up the beast went plummeting down under gravity's call.. it weighed about 30kg! Luckily it missed my feet due to my soon-to-be-patented irish jig avosion hop, and massively dented the wooden stage below. From the impact two tone knobs fell off and the bridge readjusted it's action to give constant fret buzz.. The guy who'd bought it just went "oh that happens sometimes" and picked it up again..
Quote by the humanity
You will be the High Lowlord's High Lowlife!

Ibanez EDB 550
Laney RB6
^Ouch, that was just a plain great story. To be honest, I've never played a bass in really terrible shape. The dean acoustic electric I briefly owned had the worst action and neck bow ever when I bought it, but after an adjustment it was fine. I've bought some junk bin basses to practice different finish/wiring/defretting techniques on and there were in absolutely horrendous shape, but I didn't actually try playing either of them.
A 90s squier P bass with rusted, yes rusted, strings. I can't even begin to describe how much that hurt the first and second fingers on my right hand, but nowadays, they're so calloused that poking them with a sharp knife doesn't even sting, let alone get through the skin, so maybe it was worth it.
"I hope I die before I get old"-Words of Pete Townsend, 1945-

"I hope I die before I turn into Pete Townsend"-Words of Kurt Cobain, 1967-1994

Funny old world eh.
Ok, now for a rant about the worst basses ive ever played, and they were all owned by the secondary school i went to. First up is the red Westfeild P-bass copy, which while it sounded and looked fine, the distance between the strings and the pickguard was so small i couldn't actualy play it in any sort of comfort.

Next up is the two black basses which were copies of something, but i can't quite remember what. The nuts on the bases were pretty bad so the A and E strings kept falling out, but they were very comfortable to play apart from that slightly major issue.

However, by far the worst bass ive ever played was a black and white p-bass copy by Encore. I cant remember what was right about it. Its tone knobs were loose. It sounded pretty poor. Its neck was sticky so it was impossible to slide comfortably with. It was rather uncomfortable to hold. Its Nut was re-enforced with paper to stop the strings falling out, and It's machine heads rattled terribly whenever you played anything, and had to be filled with paper. It was a terrible bass.

What is even more startling is rather than replacing this cheap bass that probably cost about £90, goverment rules mean you have to fix it if it can be fixed. So the school had to get it fixed.

It cost them £150

and it was still complete shit. It was stil uncomfortable to play. The machine heads hadnt been fixed either. They could have bought a decent bass like a gsr-200 for that money. Hell, even a new Stagg would be a massive improvement, but instead theyve now got a bass thats cost them £240 thats worth about a tenner.

"Just wait till tomorrow
I guess that's what they all say
Just before they fall apart"
In my case there is a stiff competion between a 1970's Kasuga Jazz knock off with a Squier neck and a similar Kasuga with an original neck. The former was given to our club (of volunteers dedicated to engange mentally handicapped people in making rock and pop music) by the guy who tried to build a bass for himself but couldn't get it running. The neck was totally out of alignment; the strings hovering about 3cm above the fretboard. Yet I did play it at several occasions till the Rotary Club gave us a new Squire Modified Vintage Jazz. I took the crooked Jazz home and managed to convert it into a fine working guitar though.
The Kasuga with the original neck we got from the widow of an old bassist who passed away. The man happily played a bass that had it's nut 3mm too high and its bridge attached two centimeters too close to the neck. All notes were half a semitone off, but the deceased owner never noticed (or never bothered). Still this was relatively easy to correct, but all four tuners being two millimeters to the left of true alignment made it a hopeless case. It is still sitting around in our studio, but is only used for playback acts.

Those 1970's cheapies were really, really bad. To all nostalgic old people complaining that 'they don't make them like that anymore' and to young people complaining about the quality of Staggs an Vintages I would say; get real. Cheap guitars were never as good as they are now.
Quote by Marcel Veltman
In my case there is a stiff competion between a 1970's Kasuga Jazz knock off with a Squier neck and a similar Kasuga with an original neck.

Kasuga Jazz copy... sound familiar, anybody?
Quote by Cody_Grey102
I was looking at a used Warwick Vampyre LTD 5'er for about $200. I went home to grab my wallet and came back and some jerk with an epic beard got it already..
My first bass. God it was terrible. A P Bass copy, stupidly high acton, weak sounding, really heavy. Stupidly unplayable. How i used to play i it have no idea.
A bc rich mockingbird i bought whitout trying because i thougth it looked cool. the higher strings hardly even worked and the paint came off really easy.
My schools mexican Fender jazz.
That should change soon, though, as I plan to fix the truss rod in the near future.
Oh, forgot to mention the fretless Epiphone EB-1 with flatwounds that I infamously took to the front counter and demanded repair of its perfectly functioning tone knob.
Quote by Cody_Grey102
I was looking at a used Warwick Vampyre LTD 5'er for about $200. I went home to grab my wallet and came back and some jerk with an epic beard got it already..
A P-bass. The neck was like: (

And I could barely play it. I don't know how I got through that gig...
~don't finkdinkle when ur supposed to be dimpdickin~
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