Ok, how do I critique this?

Well, I'm going to go ahead and critique the vocals...obviously they're not good from a traditional standpoint. I understand of course you were "going for something here", but I think if you brought it back from the screech a bit, the lyrics (which are great) would come through more clearly. I'd mix in a few "yeahs" in there in a deep, low, smooth Barry White voice (but that's just personal preference).

Guitar playin' was good.

I think of all my songs, you'd probably like "Guitar" best:

We'll see!