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#3
went in the pit...

also one time i threw up in the middle of class but it was the teacher's fault.

i was about 5/6 and we were sat on the floor listening to the teacher talk when i started to feel like i was gonna throw up, so i politely put my hand up. the teacher said "not now SlipknotRule93 (yeh...) in a minute." so i waited for i bit with my hand still in the air feeling really bad.

i had positioned myself quite well and far away from the other kids. this proved very helpful in the next few minutes.

so my teacher kept yammering on so i got fed up and said "miss...
"

and it all went on the floor. fortunately no one was puked on and we all went home.

that'll teach you to not let me chuck.
Stand up and cheer if you like SimCity

Play Up Pompey, Pompey Play Up
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Quote by goest
I'm going to take this opportunity to initiate my campaign to replace the phrase "Taking a shit" with "Busting a grumpy."
#5
Stand up and cheer if you like SimCity

Play Up Pompey, Pompey Play Up
THE WiLDHEARTS

Quote by goest
I'm going to take this opportunity to initiate my campaign to replace the phrase "Taking a shit" with "Busting a grumpy."
#6
when i was about 7 or 8, i used to have these toy cars that were huge (about the size of the average computer tower) and a neighbor and i would throw them on top of a barn and see which one would win in a race back down. well one got stuck and we threw a huge rock (about the size of my head) to try to hit and and get it down. we were successful but i thought i would be cool and get the car before the rock hit the ground.

i failed, ended up with loads of stitches in the top of my head...
Quote by Duff_McGee
Everyone knows that the day the Metallica ends, the world ends.
#7
My story's pretty sweet.

When i was about two or so, i took my diaper off and ate my own shit....for real. I also drew on the walls with it.
#8
i inserted two iron rod into the electric plug then something exploded. the only thing i remember , i was 4 meters away from plug and my hands were full black i used to be a dangerous kid and one day i asked my friend when i was 8 years old and told him are you afraid of fire he said no. then i light a match and sticked it to his face.then he screamed like a hell :P dont look that way im not psycho
The Life = A Place To Waste Energy
#10
Once when I was young I woke up sleep walking (I dont remember any of it) asking where mum was (at about 11pm) and my brother said mum had gone shopping! and I was like, okay, and so he made me go back to bed, and I woke up roped to my bed.

*prepares for rape jokes* however jokes aside,it was a pretty funny event.


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Gibson guitars, Les Paul, ES-335, SG and more.
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Planet Waves Custom Leads
Marshall JCM900 (model: 4100 + 4101)

TooJoo The Band
#11
when i was about 9 or 10 we were at my grandparents for christmas and i snuck some wine into another room. not much but at that age enough to get my quite tipsy... and then i decided to climb onto the roof of their house... people werent happy about that hehe. but it all ended ok.
#12
i bit a table
Quotes from other UGers in your signatures that talk about how good you are suck donkey schlong.
#13
Quote by SlipknotRule93
went in the pit...

also one time i threw up in the middle of class but it was the teacher's fault.

i was about 5/6 and we were sat on the floor listening to the teacher talk when i started to feel like i was gonna throw up, so i politely put my hand up. the teacher said "not now SlipknotRule93 (yeh...) in a minute." so i waited for i bit with my hand still in the air feeling really bad.

i had positioned myself quite well and far away from the other kids. this proved very helpful in the next few minutes.

so my teacher kept yammering on so i got fed up and said "miss...
"

and it all went on the floor. fortunately no one was puked on and we all went home.

that'll teach you to not let me chuck.

Once, in class, some kid threw up all over the girl in front of him. He didn't tell the teacher, or anyone for that matter. Gave the poor kid quite a shock.

I ran into a fence. An extremely sharp, electric fence, which gave me 2 scars on my stomach, 2 on my arms, and one all the way down the side of my face just missing my eye (which you can hardly see anymore, luckily).
My Last.fm
USA Fender Stratocaster | Roland Cube 60 | VOX ToneLab LE
#14
I was like 6 or 7, snuck out of my house the night before Halloween and put chicken bones in people's mailboxes.
#15
sometimes i would take either maple or chocolate syrup and hide behind the couch (it was stationed against a wall in the living room) to drink it straight from the bottle.
#17
I joined Cub Scouts.............


WHY???
*Cries like a little girl*
Music is an art form that celebrates potential. So long as you're looking for it, you'll always find it.
#18
When i was young my friends and i would get a bunch of boxes and make forts with them. Once, one of them found some porn under a big garbage container. We took it back and hid it inside the fort. A couple of minutes later they had to go back home to eat (all 3 were brothers) and i stayed alone in the fort (which was outside). I went ahead and put the porn in my pocket and was gonna hide it inside my house, but at that moment my mom came out and tells me we're going out to the store.

Trust me... it's not comfortable walking around downtown with ur mom and porn in ur pockets for an hour when you're only 7.

haha


btw: i told my friends i had left and that maybe someone had gone inside the fort and stolen it.
Originally Posted by evening_crow
Quoting yourself is cool.


WARNING: I kill threads.
#19
once in science class my teacher was talking about vibrations and said "can you tell me what vibrates" of course i tought it was funny to shout a vibrator and make buzzing noises lol noone laughed only my mate next to me giggled i got sent home lawl.
#21
Jumped off a flight of stairs in a batman suit thinking I could fly and knocked myself out.
Woke up half way to the hospital in the car and was fine haha.

I also drank 3/4 bottle of dettol when I was around 4
GOOD SHIT!
#22
Quote by punk_metal
Jumped off a flight of stairs in a batman suit thinking I could fly and knocked myself out.
Woke up half way to the hospital in the car and was fine haha.
GOOD SHIT!


That's retarded man.


Batman couldn't fly
#23
Quote by E*N
That's retarded man.


Batman couldn't fly

I know, thats what makes it a whole lot more depressing
#24
Quote by punk_metal
I know, thats what makes it a whole lot more depressing

My brother did that from a tree thinking he was superman.

You fail even more

Originally Posted by evening_crow
Quoting yourself is cool.


WARNING: I kill threads.
#25
i used to pray and believe in god....talk about a waste of time.

Even if you are a religious type (I'm atheist) it's the most egoistic thing in the world to believe that you would actually be able to affect the will and actions of god. In the words of Jim Morrison "you cannot petition the lord with prayer"
Hi I'm
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#26
I jumped of my box of toys thinking I was Super Ted and landed face first into the corner of 2 walls coming together. I split my face in 2 places, 1 on my lip, where my lips was dangling split pouring blood and one under my eyebrow which had to be shaved (I KNOW RIGHT?) to be sewn up.

Shit times.

RMF


I was much further out than you thought
And not waving but drowning.
I was much too far out all my life
And not waving but drowning.
#27
I remember once in my living room I pooped on the carpet and in desperation I tried to shove under the sofa, I got caught
Hull City A.F.C

Quote by Thrashtastic15
crunkym toy diuckl;ess ass ****igkjn ****** **** bitch ass pussy ****er douchecanoe ****** **** you s omn cnt you lieet le biutch
#28
Quote by mrjimborinsane
i used to pray and believe in god....talk about a waste of time.

Even if you are a religious type (I'm atheist) it's the most egoistic thing in the world to believe that you would actually be able to affect the will and actions of god. In the words of Jim Morrison "you cannot petition the lord with prayer"


having spent most of my life believing in god, i can say that the idea behind prayer is "if you humble yourself and ask for help, it will be given"

but i can see where you're coming from.
#29
In P5 ( So when I was about 8 or 9 for you yanks ) I managed to break the schools television by lifting up one of the wheels of it's stand. Best part was my family didn't get charged a penny.
The one with the royal sceptre and gown

Quote by leaping badger
i like drag


Member of the "I died a little inside when Steve Irwin died...RIP" club. Put in your sig to join.
#30
lets see here.
ate cat food (only once. i promise), jumped about 15 foot from a tree, which ended in me having some serious ankle issue for a while.
i attacked a cat with a toy axe. and lost. oh yeah, and jumped off a flight of stairs about 4 foot high, and headbutted a banister so hard i passed out.
ahh, i miss the olden days
There was a Signature here.

It's gone now.
#31
I used to tie string round my teddies and dangle them off the roof pretending they could fly.
RULE BRITANNIA
#32
I just remembered that when i was around 6 i tried licking the ice off the freezer (u know those old fridges that had frost all over after a couple of weeks?). I ended up with my lips stuck to the ice and had to pull myself away cuz my mom was too busy watching tv in her room.

I left bloody imprints of my lips on the ice.


Also... i once tried to eat some black pepper straight from the shaker but the lid was loose and it all went down my mouth...
Originally Posted by evening_crow
Quoting yourself is cool.


WARNING: I kill threads.
#33
Quote by evening_crow
I just remembered that when i was around 6 i tried licking the ice off the freezer (u know those old fridges that had frost all over after a couple of weeks?). I ended up with my lips stuck to the ice and had to pull myself away cuz my mom was too busy watching tv in her room.

I did that a while ago, was eating ice and it got stuck to my tongue. I ripped it off and blood went everywhere. Still stains on my mate's kitchen floor.
RULE BRITANNIA
#34
Quote by Cobain_Is_King
I used to tie string round my teddies and dangle them off the roof pretending they could fly.

Sounds like you had problems as a child
#35
I made my barbies Lesbian's and I use to rip there heads off and swap there head's and body's around then I decided to give one of my barbies a mohawk... it didn't work.
Other then that no other stories, I was a boring child.
#37
when i was about 5 i took a shit, an it was the fudgy kind, problem was there was no toilet paper, so i used the hand towel next to the sink.

thing is i didnt tell anyone, and my older sister wasnt too pleased when she tried to dry her hands......
you gonna get raped!!!!!!!


#38
also, sort of like my sicking problem in yr 1 i mentioned...

in yr 6, about 10 or 11 yrs old,

the bitch of a headteacher made us all stay in the assembly hall during break as a punishment for something only a few kids did. i hate it when adults know perfectly well who the main culprits are but cant be arsed to chase them up, btw. so we were all that there in silence for half an hour when we could have been outside playing, having fun and going for a piss.

needless to say i pissed myself in the middle of the hall and denied it.

Quote by Mr. La Fritz
I jumped of my box of toys thinking I was Super Ted


i used to take Super Ted's vitamin pills. they were strawberry and tasted nice.
Stand up and cheer if you like SimCity

Play Up Pompey, Pompey Play Up
THE WiLDHEARTS

Quote by goest
I'm going to take this opportunity to initiate my campaign to replace the phrase "Taking a shit" with "Busting a grumpy."
#40
1. Washed my hands in the toilet
2. Poured baby oil down the toilet
3. Touched a burning stove
4. Stood on a flimsy table, resulting in a broken arm
5. Hit my sister on the head a lot. Wait, that's not really stupid. Yeah that's actually alright.
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