#1
It's pretty rough right now, so any criticism would help a lot. Thanks.

Verse:
Rewind three years
Let's watch the memories go by
with you on my side
We faded oh so fast
..Wait, let's pause here when we said this would last

Pre-Chorus
I savored that moment
I wish you would have done the same
Maybe things wouldn't turn out to be this way
But I don't regret
Anything I've done or said
Cause everything I've done and said
..I meant.

Chorus
Where did the time go?
Can't you see that I'm still here?
When will your heart show
that you still care?

Verse:
Oh, I look at you
Do you see me?
I see right through
the mask you keep
But
It won't come off
I don't know, who you are anymore.

Chorus:
Where did the time go?
Can't you see that I'm still here?
When will your heart show
that you still care?

Bridge:
Maybe one day you will realize that I am still here.
As far as distance may take us
Know I'm always near

Chorus:
Where did the time go?
Know that I've always been right here
When will your heart know
that I still care?

Outro:
Everything I want to tell you,
everything I want to say
is right underneath my tongue.
I might as well keep it there.
#2
I liked most of it, and only have 2 points that I think could be changed. In the first pre-chorus, the last line. The repetition of "I've done or said" seems kind of awkward to me. The other part is the last line of the outro, "I might as well keep it there" seems to me like it disrupts the nice flow you had going on, and seems to almost anti-climax the song. Everything else, I liked though.

Nice work, hope I helped.
New To Town With A Made Up Name

In The Angel's City

Chasing Fortune And Fame
09/03/2012
#3
Thanks man. I think I'll just take off the last line in the outro. It'll probably help a lot. I'm not sure what to do with the pre chorus one yet, but thanks for the input.