#1
Hey guys, so I wrote lyrics to this song, and I also have some good music to go with it. I just need to know your opinion on the words, they are my first real lyrics, so give me some feedback.

Welcome back to reality
all the places you've gotta see
before it all comes to an end

Back to life and dreams and School
into the deep end of the pool
live to find just one true friend

*Solo guitar break*

Life is fragile life is weak
Happiness is what we seek
It's waiting/hiding/always (not sure what word I like there) just beyond the bend

Don't give up without a fight
around the corner there is light
It just takes time for hearts to mend

*Instrumental breakdown*

Live it up while you still can
Make your way with your own plan
Be yourself set your own trend

People go their seperate ways
Friendships will begin to fray
Don't lose sight of your true friend

*maybe another guitar solo or maybe not*

What do you think? Also, which word do you like best
at the end of the third stanza? Thanks guys, I will post up the whole song with the music when I get an adapter for my computer.
Last edited by Ape_Natural at Nov 1, 2008,
#2
Based on the feel of the song I'd say waiting sounds best to me.

Pretty good song. I always love it when people break away from the "verse chorus verse chorus" structure. Looking forward to hearing the real song.
#3
Yeah, I like waiting the best to. That is what I have written on the original paper, but I was contemplating changing it.
#4
I really liked that.
Hope you can post the song soon
I think wiating works best as well. although hiding could be quite good also.

check out some of my stuff if you have time
V
My current acoustic group:

Fiftieth Parallel

Martin Guitars
Elixer Strings
Acoustic amplification
BOSS pedals

#5
yeah, I will probably have the song posted up within the week, I just need to get a 1/4 to 1/8 adapter to plug into my computer for recording.