#1
There's an anchor around my foot
A barnacle stuck to my chest
why dont you go
and crush someone elses dreams?

Using Logic to beat retardation
is like using hugs to tame a bear
Im fighting a losing battle
this bear is ripping me to peices

Your Mouth says "We're just trying to help"
But all I hear is "Your a disgrace"
Your mouth says "I love you"
yet your eyes scream "Im ashamed"

Im sinking deeper into a sea of despair
while the fish nibble on my flesh.
I will never be alive
till I rid myself of this anchor

These are for my Death Metal Band, comments and constructive criticism are highly appreciated.
www.myspace.com/onelastcleansing
#3
wow, somehow i read "destructive criticism" instead of "constructive criticism"

anyways, death metal is definately not my thing, but these r some pretty kick ass lyrics. theyre weird in a badass kinda way
Gear

Guitar:
Squier Strat

Amp:
Fender Roc Pro 1000 Half Stack

Pedals:
Digitech Bad Monkey
Dunlop Original Crybaby Wah
Digitech Cool Cat Chorus
#4
Quote by Left For Dead
There's an anchor around my foot
A barnacle stuck to my chest seems like you ran out of ideas and put this line in because "it fits". i dont think it does, possibly beacuse barnacle isnt a common word in... anything but nautical terms. maybe rework it to expand on the first line, maybe something like "and your hand cleched round my heart". or something alittle less cliche.
why dont you go
and crush someone elses dreams?

Using Logic to beat retardation
is like using hugs to tame a bear
Im fighting a losing battle
this bear is ripping me to peices
i like this idea, made me smile, well done.

Your Mouth says "We're just trying to help"
But all I hear is "Your a disgrace"
Your mouth says "I love you"
yet your eyes scream "Im ashamed"
again nice idea.

Im sinking deeper into a sea of despair
while the fish nibble on my flesh.
I will never be alive
till I rid myself of this anchor
good return to anchor here. try thinking of a harder word for nibble, make the little fish nwo turn into pirahnas, maybe gnaw? especially death metal, you want words to sound hard and sharp.

please, before submitting, go a quick check over spelling/grammar. makes it all so much easier.


i dont kow much about death metal lyrics, but these are pretty good.