#1
This is the only poem I've written that I think is good enough to post up here. I haven't been writing poetry for more than a few months, so go easy on me.

It's a great feeling
to leave reality, to melt
into space; my jackhammer heart
chips away all that is concrete
as my body unravels like a sweater
with a loose thread.
#3
I'm not the best at articulating myself, butheregoes:

It either should be more simply expressed or more developed. For what you've got, I'd say more developed. Don't be afraid to keep writing, to get everything out. It seems like you had everything there, but you were just afraid to keep going, perhaps because it would be 'bad'. **** that, write for yourself and everyone else. Write because you can, and because it's good for your teeth.
マリ「しあわっせはーあるいってこないだーからあるいってゆっくんだねーん 
いっちにっちいっぽみーかでさんぽ
 さーんぽすすんでにっほさっがるー 
じーんせいはっわんつー!ぱんち・・・


"Success is as dangerous as failure. Hope is as hollow as fear." - from Tao Te Ching