#1
Have you ever felt a feeling so strong?
The feeling you get when your into a song.
This feeling means nothing to me.
Ive tried so hard for two years
all my words have gone through your ears
but this year im so im almost there so why dont
stop its time to take a dare
so what will it be is it time time for you and me
and heres the truth i love you chelsea

i know it sucks really bad but can i get any tips or pointers
#3
Ignore the dude above, its decent.

The thing is with personal songs like this is that its not going to be to everyones taste because its your own thoughts on a certain situation in your life so ya cant really give any pointers.

If it's good to you and reflects what your feeling then thats how it comes out, no point trying to make it better, its just how you feel at that stage in your life.

hope that helps.
Originally Posted by Chromeproguitar
they make horrible noises in the middle of the night (is it sex?)

Quote by CliffIsAngry
I guess she's pretty hot if you're into that "having a good music video, but not better than Beyonce's" kind of thing...
#6
I like it but I think that the rhymes sound a little forced. But if you just want a love song, they can sound a little bit sappy and get away with it. Check mine in my sig...
Quote by Ponyexpress
Grammar Nazis scare the living crap out of me mainly because I'm half Jewish


MY SONGS:
[thread="985311"]A Love/Hate Relationship[/thread]
[thread="985301"](All) I Can See[/thread]
[thread="983897"]My Heart is a Hand Grenade[/thread]