#1
If some of you could be soo kind as to critic some of the songs on my profile it would be greatly appreciated, as of right now everyone i have uploaded is original, if i upload any non originals i'll be sure to make it clear.

Thanks! I'll also check out anything you have for me to listen to!

Edit: Thanks to all the critic soo far! It's greatly appreciated im going to take it to heart and definitely try and work on my comp so more, thanks!
Last edited by AbombO.S. at Nov 14, 2008,
#2
Both Dream of Glass and Magnification are pretty cool. Dream of Glass unfortunately doesn't go anywhere too amazing or interesting though, so it gets old pretty quick. Turning the tapping lick into an actual song would be nice though. Its a decent start. Magnification suffers from the same, its just two parts, the intro and the solo and doesn't do anything else for the listener. The intro is cool but way too long. There's like a 1:2 ratio for intro to main song which is unnecessary. You can play which is great, just work on composition.

Also, the acoustic guitar in Magnification is over driving. Is this on purpose? I found it to be very distracting.

Keep it up, I think you got some decent stuff waiting to be recorded.
#3
Dream of Glass - Cool. But very sloppy. It also has no musical theme, which is imperative for any successful piece of music.

Magnification - As Johnny said, too repetitive. But I guess the trance feel is what you were looking for. Your "acoustic" (is that a clean electric in an attempt to sound acoustic?) strumming patterns need a bit of work. Your accented strokes hit too hard. As far as your solo goes, I needs more thought. It has no feel yet has no shred attraction. Not a good balance. If you think about what is being played and put some "feel" into it, it could turn out great.
#5
Hey man, I just checked your music. I usually leave constructive opinions, not the typical "great, you nailed it" that will take you nowhere.

First of all, you got talent. Nobody can take that from you (unless your brother is the one playing!). I also noticed, like other posters did, that the songs are played a bit sloppy--this only gets corrected through practice however.

Also, I notice some immaturity in your tunes; like you are imitating stuff you have heard and practice. This is not bad, it is actually good. Guitar players first develop a sense of "I can play that song of **** band," which changes over time to a genuine sound that will say "hey, that can't be anybody else than AbombO.S!"

Keep it coming fellow,

Your friend,

kRem
#6
Dream of glass - Sounds pretty good to me, maybe add some kind of synthisised string section behind it or something? Or like some kind of pad. That would really fill out the sound.

It could be played a bit cleaner but it's sounding good so far.


Overall - 9/10

Magnification - Like a couple of others have said, it's too repeatitive. I agree with what the other guy said about the electric (or acoustic, what ever it is) and your strumming. It's also sounds like you've got too much gain or are recording at a volume which is too high. The chord progression was cool though, and the leads reminded me of Slash a little, which is cool.

Overall, 7/10
I deeply regret the 6661 in my username. Siiiigh. Damn you, 14 year old me, you edgy little bastard.
#8
REally like the phrasing and timing and the whole sense of "what should follow" on Magnification.
Altho u can get a lot more out of your potential if you branch out of the pentatonics occasionaly. This was pretty good too tho.
cheers.
Set up:-
Kustom Sound 40W Guitar Amp
Marshall MG15 CD
Zoom 707 II (surprisingly good..)
VOX Tonelab ST
Jackson DK2M (Seymour duncan TB4 and the SD jazz)
#9
Dream of Glass: I think this really has some potential. The chord progression is really nice and the tapping has a nice effect. The only problem is that, as said above, it doesn't go anywhere and you keep going back to the same progression. I like how you change the rhythm and tempo around here and there but you should at least progress to different themes or progressions. It really does have some potential to be a full song though.

Magnification: The fade effect is really cool though I'm not a huge fan of this kind of ambient atmosphere. Once again though, it is very cool but a bit repetitive. The soloing later on is pretty good though, I like the wah-wah. The main thing you need to work on is song structure, whether in generic Verse-Chorus AB pattern or in an obscure constantly changing setup, some structure is always good.

Crit mine?
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=997058
Last edited by TheNoManBand at Nov 15, 2008,
#10
Thanks for all the critic! I've put two new songs up that are kind of "Rough drafts" to try and work on the song writing deal. I've had both the two ideas for awhile and tried noodling around with changing key sigs. Could you guys leave your imput on the two? The solos are both very shoddy i know but i plan on cleaning them up when i record the finished product thanks!
#11
Nice work , the start of Dream Of Glass reminds me of Eruption, but in a slow beautiful way. It is a great to a song. I dig the tone , and you're only a junior in high school! You have really good quality as well , I could def' listen to this stuff. Look forward to hearing more stuff!
#12
It's pretty good man, it just needs a hook, which is probably the same problem I'm having with my work. Just try to make things more interesting with dynamics in Dreaming of glass, and maybe build up to some craziness, but overall good.
#13
i enjoyed magnification the most.

it had a neat sleepy like quality to it, relaxing and the chords were simple yet effective enough to get across the mood.

Dream of glass quickly irritated me. it reminded me of old tapping exercises as opposed to an actual song.
Grammar and spelling omitted as an exercise for the reader.