After how long does one needs to ask a girl a question, like 'Are you single?'
The back story behind this is that, I have gone on 2 dates with this girl and was planning for a second one tomorrow. But I got to know from a female friend of mine, who is the best friend sorta of the said date, that she aint single anymore. In fact this friend of mine set me up on a date with that girl, so am kinda puzzled and confused.
I have really shitty luck, as am always getting mangled between psycho chicks and overly-shy chicks. In the past, A girl whom I liked and it was pretty obvious to her too, told me that she didn't find me as the guy she would be into. So, I tried moving on(thanks RT for that) and dated a couple of girls out of whom, my latest date was the best friend of the above said girl. Dates, talks and everything was going fine with this girl until recently. The girl from the past broke up from her bf(which USED to be my good friend), and since then her interest in me has sort of increased, with she calling me to hangout or sometimes calling me over enroute from her internship for a ride and to hangout. It has struck my mind that she may be using me as a rebound or that I am giving myself away too easily and she's using me. And lately, the girl that I was dating, hasn't been that warming while txting/chatting, and is showing signs of less interest(I may be wrong).
Hence, I need an advice for my chaos, and specifically, am I serving her myself on an easy plate?
I recently got a job after graduating and my joining date is around 2 months from now(10th of October) BUT its in another city which is around 1800 kms away. Only plus point being that its a 4 month training at that city and then I can move/be posted to some other city closer. Also, there is a probability of me going for post-graduate programs in/around my city depending on how well my exams go.
Now, the problem. I had dated this girl, friend of a friend, just a couple of times. Some may remember, as I had shared this. We stayed in touch, not that we were talking everyday, but yes it seemed like she was open and interested. One of those shy girls and blah blah(everyone knows how them 'SHY' girls are). Lately, I have been planning to hang out more with her and gonna ask her out(have asked her before but plan gets cancelled due to her insecurity/sm stupid reason). So should I go further or should I just stop?
easiest solution: ask out more girls, hopefully find some normal ones. seriously neither of these situations are ones you want to deal with on a constant basis
These situations are really mindfcuk types. About girl #2, We both make plans and its always she that cancels it. I understand if I ask her out and she bails on me, then she's not interested. But sending flirty msgs and then asking me out a couple of times only to bail out later leaves me with 'WTF'. Lol, its crazy yet funny. Sooner or later, the guy is gonna lose interest. 'Girl, y u no think strait? '
It was a blind date, and we hardly know each other. So its quite understandable for her to feel uncomfortable. The chances of interaction face-to-face seems less now, so should I be talking/texting more to gain her trust and then asking out, right?
I'm back with another problem. My near past in simple words: 1. Me on a double date setup by my friend's girlfriend. 2. Me in contact with the date, and trying to setup more dates. 3. The girl is asking me to ask my friend's girlfriend to tag along. 4. Every time the date gets cancelled because of the other girl making excuses.
She is still a bit insecure and whenever I ask her out, to which she doesnt decline, but asks me to ask my friend's gf to tag along, which is fine with me. I got to know recently from his gf directly that they have broken off recently and because of that she wants to cut all ties with me as well. Because of this reason, she had been making excuses for not coming.
I had a chat with the girl recently and she told me a date on sunday if the mutual friend is free. I told her about what that friend thought and she wont come, so its better to postpone everything for a while. She said that she will have a talk with that friend.
My question/problem is: I want this thing to carry on, with or without the help of the mutual friend. I have been a lil clingy this week, asking for a date(if i had known earlier, i would have been a lil more patient). So, should I stop thinking about a date in the near future and increase more interaction to a point where she thinks its not necessary for the other girl to tag along? If so, can anyone help me a lil more about conversating often without being clingy?
I know the debate between Calling and Texting has passed, but am still a bit confused!
I mean, I endorse the fact that Texting is better(in my PoV) since you aren't forcing anyone to converse with you and one doesn't feel bad if a reply isn't received. On the other hand, texting seems like a wimp's job who couldn't man up to directly interact. (Yet am the texting-type of guy )
So, my problem is that, even though I wanna talk to the girl i dated recently, but some ego problems like 'why should I be the one to call always','maybe her not calling me means that she ain't into me' ,etc, sprout up and I don't call her. Yet, on the other hand I do text her and receive her replies and she has even added me on FB. Also, she is one of those type who don't quite give themselves away on a date.
So, any tip on 'How to Man Up?' OR 'How to put my ego aside?' !
Hmmm, that's a good enough point. Anyways, maybe I didn't frame it properly but that seems possible. I may be over analyzing things here but do you think I need to lay low and wait till the end of exams?
Story behind this ques: I asked the girl that i dated once for another date, maybe to some sheesha lounge or something. After a lil talking, out came her reply that 'she doesn't want to be distracted and wants to focus on her exams, which are about 2-3 weeks from now'. Decent enough answer, but when i stopped asking(was asking her 2/3rd time, hehe, never gonna give up :P ) , out came her message asking me where is the place am talking about.
Now, I got really confused, she doesn't want to go but wants to know where the place is and she doesn't have a working net connection yet she is interested in adding me on FB(which FYI I haven't received any request till now)!! Seriously, am confused and lost!
Some update, (nothing much happened but just progressing ahead to let the helpers know that their advice was counted upon )
My date's exams ended and I asked her out yesterday. Seems that she isn't fully comfortable with going alone with me as she asked me to ask our mutual friend to come along too. Sadly for me, the friend wasn't in town so she asked me to drop the plan. Gonna ask her out this week again, being persistent is the key?
I haven't talked with her as I would hope to because of her exams and me feeling a bit awkward to disturb her. Now seems a good time to share more and get to know each other better. So via text messages or phone calls?
Am 21 now, 5'10'' and only 56kgs. I am looking to gain some weight without the use of any supplements, not become bulky but at least healthy. I eat pretty much everything but not in a consistent diet regime. So please can anyone suggest me a good diet regime or something?
Had a decent enough text-chat with my date yesterday, and got to know that she was having her exams next week. So I asked if she got bored of studying, maybe we could hang out at some hookah lounge or something. She said that she had to study and said that we'll meet after 28th. Seems decent enough attempt for a second date. What say? Also, this time she initiated the chat via a random joke.
PS: I hope no one minds my story, as most of my friends are di-c-k-heads and sharing this with them wont give me any sane enough advice.
Went for the date with the friend who hooked me up. It felt like an okayish type of date, but I felt really awkward as I was the only one drinking beer. Though, the girl offered to buy me some vodka when we were leaving the joint. Mood was pleasant with her playing really old romantic songs in my car. Asked for her number, which she gladly gave. My friend was pointing out that she maybe a lil impressed. But I haven't completely heard what my friend thinks, as the girl and my friend had decided to stay at my friend's house.
So, obviously, I know that it takes more than 1 date to see if it works out, but do I have to call her everyday, or a message once in while is OK? And, ask my friend to fix more dates? Or do I fix dates myself since I have her number?
PS: I had messaged her that night asking how did she like it, with a reply being 'fine' and asking the same question from me.
I have been in a small relationship, have dated quite a few girls that I knew, but never on a blind date.
So lately, one of my gal buddy hooked me up for a blind date with one of her friend whom I don't know but have met once. So my question is, do I need to be formal on a blind date, like get some gifts or flowers or chocolates (flowers and chocolates had worked but I knew those girls).
And will hookah lounge/pub work or does it have to be something more formal like a dining place for lunch or something?
I had a really bad bout of acne in my teens which has left scars/marks on my back. I do not feel comfortable exposing my back, hence more of tshirts and collared shirts kindof guy i am (no sleeveless). Hence, I do not wish to get my back tattooed coz of marks and skin sensitivity.
So, I am kinda confused about where to get myself inked
Ok, thanks for the input. But the problem is that, I am very thin(true rockstar style ), and getting a tattoo on the arm/biceps wont look good. Also, I cant get a tattoo on my back because of Acne marks and freckles. Any other area you can think off? Back of the neck(easily concealable by using collared shirts).
I have decided to get myself tattooed, but I am confused about the place to be inked at. The confusion is in between: side of the neck, back of the neck, back of the hand(on the region between thumb and index finger).
Also, i have thought about 2 designs, first being a music notation(pretty cliched for a musician) and second being a crescent moon with stars(portraying about dreaming big).
So any help on this matter, pit monkeys?
PS: Am about to complete my graduation and probably looking for interviews to get into B-Schools, though i have secured a job.
Its not that I dont like her or want her to hate me because I didnt get what I got. I want them both, her and my friend to be happy, but whenever I am around, he gets really conscious and nervous and I feel out of place. I didnt stop ignoring her, just that since she wasnt interested in me, I lessened the number of calls/messages. I even told my friend that I dont have any problem as long as everything seems ok. Yet they both behave strangely. Infact, she invited me to her b'day party yet they both left 15-20 mins after I came and all the time, the situation was awkward. I am really confused, on one side I want them both to not worry about me, yet they make it appear that I am the third angle of their relationship. Hell, she even knew that I liked her and she asked me before committing. I really think I have been taken for granted.
Am planning to sort this out once my friend comes back from his hometown. Should I resolve this and be back to being friends with her or just cut-off all ties?
I liked a girl and we often conversed on phone or between classes. We got to know each other more and more. She did not know anyone in my group so I asked my friend to help me, so that she doesnt feel alone in the group. Slowly(which i came to know a lot late), this girl and my friend started liking each other. For short time, i was really broken as I liked the girl. But I overcame and we became just friends. Now my friend feels guilty all the time(this was told by that girl), and doesnt even talk to me as we used to before(have to admit I have changed a bit too). So, I wanted her to be happy and for me to move on, decided to end it(not even friendship). I told her that we should be acquaintances only and nothing more for the sake of them and mine. Turned out that she cant let go of me from her life and she really respects and adores me.
Now, my questions is that where was that respect and adoration when I wanted her? I really want this drama to end, yet she aint letting me. I cant cut off my friend because it isnt possible. This is the last year in college and I want to leave this past behind. So how do I go about it??? HELP!
@mh400nt: Thanks for sharing the information. I am 21 and about to complete my graduation and gonna look for a job after this, so yes the tattoo on the neck maybe a bad idea.
So what area can you suggest for the first tattoo?? (I had an acne problem in my teen years which has left marks on the chest and the back, so I am trying to avoid that particular region). I have seen people get tattoo on there forearms which looked nice.
Update: I have realised that I was the one who ****ed it up, having a shot at the target and never shooting. So I have decided to move on, and try to find another girl. BUT:
Just a simple question: Am in college, hang out mostly with friends. Havent met new people for quite some time now(have a big group of like 7-8 people). So what is my best bet at meeting a new girl?? Am thinking of joining Salsa classes, not for the woman factor but because of my passion for dance.
Ok, I am in a situation here. So here goes my story:
There is this girl(like always) whom I liked from 6 months back and we used to talk on the phone pretty much every other day. She even came to my last gig and was keen on learning guitar from me, etc. etc. I thought something was brewing, yet I didnt have the courage to formally ask her out because of the fear of losing a well developed bond.
Enter my friend, whom she had known because of me. I asked him to give her company at my last gig and had trusted him. Apparently, after the gig, like 2-3 weeks ago, he started chatting on the phone and something developed. He started liking her and even she also started responding back. Now, my friend whom I trusted and who knew about my liking towards her, didnt tell me his doings because according to him he didnt want a relation and was scared of losing me as his friend. The girl shared a good connection/rapport with him than me (have to admit the fact that my friend is a womaniser).
Present: It seems that all my other friends knew about all this and were cowards to not tell me this. When I came to know about this (btw it was all pure coincidence), i felt betrayed because my friend of 4 years broke my trust for a girl of 1 months(to him) and 6 months(for me). I confronted the girl, and according to her she liked both of us, as FRIENDS but him more than me. She feared her reactions towards my actions may raise my hopes as she wasnt looking for a relation at the moment. I asked her to clear her mind of this fear and even asked her if there was any future of us being together, to which she replied, maybe yes.
My friend in a fit of anger promised me to not talk to her again because he didnt want to lose me as a friend. I was happy for this fact, yet i asked him not to cut off immediately, but to tone it down a little. He did exactly the opposite and provoked her to question my intentions, that is, he made me seem as a bad guy. My friend being a jerk started conversing again with her after all this.
Now, I am tied in between a betraying friend and the girl i like. So pit, what should I do?? Move on and try to get another girl?? Continue my friendship with her in hope of something happening?? And what should I do about my friend??
A love triangle type of situation: Me and my friend liking a girl, who wants us to be GOOD FRIENDS(open to a relationship in future but not now). Girl knows me since 6 months and my friend since last month.
When your hanging out with friends, and you meet a fellow musician(guitarist, drummer, etc.) and then you start a conversation about the latest songs you have listened, their techniques, etc. and your friends get really bored and start irritating you and nagging you.
Also, you can quote instruments from your sites (guitar center,musician's friend, etc.) and I can ask my local suppliers whether they stock that. And could you please give a rough estimate of that instruments cost??
We guys had started jamming around 4 months back for which we use to bring our own practice amps(small 20 W) and drum kit(drummer's). We have performed in our college for some society's orientation(cover songs of Metallica, Motorhead, Limp bizkit, Green Day, etc).
Our basic problem: As the drummer is already in a band(that too a good one) and lives quite far from the college, it isnt feasible for him to bring his kit to the college everyday(obvious reasons).
1. We have basic influences like Hard Rock, metal, thrash, progressive. Currently doing covers. 2. Its for the college, in particular Our Band, but everyone will be allowed to play on it. 3. We will play in a room provided to us by the college. 4. We people are pretty serious in forming a band, but for know it helps in fighting boredom in the college. Also, we aim at participating in competitions, etc.