Ya'll niggaz wouldn't know satire if it made fun of yo bitchmade ass on another forum.


Now swipe yo Ebonic Bargain Treatise.
Freebo? Nice call. I'm a fan of Bonnie Raitt's old stuff so I know the name well. Hell, the guy played a fretless Fender bass...

For real though, there's a "Dream Band" thread that's supposed to culminate and perpetuate threads like this one. It will be posted just a few spaces above this one.
I'm loving the Dragon Warrior mod for Google Maps.

I spent soooo many hours playing those games.
Quote by BrainDamage
Did you expect anything less?

Actually, no.


Not at all.

I didn't start playing until I was 25. That was 7 years ago.

7 years has been more than enough time for me to become a competent guitarist, jam with a bunch of people, and create some original material.

It's fun, plain and simple, no matter what else you might get out of it.

Quote by senfarm
I am 26, I will not guitar, but I like also very much like to learn

Sigged your banned ass.
Those songs all kind of stand out on their own. What you're asking is kind of like asking for more Zeppelin songs that sound like "Kashmir".

For what it's worth, I guess, two Stones tunes that stand out for me are "Can't You Hear Me Knocking" and "Time Waits For No One".

Is there any way that you can more clearly describe what you have in mind? To say "Southern Rock" is misleading because they're an English band that likes to toy around with Rock, Country, and Blues (with some very tasteful slide); but they are thoroughly distinguishable from, say, The Allman Brothers or Skynyrd. Also, to try and shy away from the Blues is pretty much impossible as Blues is embedded in mostly everything they've recorded...

Goddamn Matt, you're an animal.
Well Axelfur, it seems that your new crotchless fursuit is now at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean.
May the hair on your toes never fall off.

G'night, nucka.
From an artist's point of view, I'd say it looks amateur. It looks more like the notebook doodling of a kid in school than it does a professional piece of art.

The colors are too solid. With better shading it would've sprung to life instead of looking like something a bored student drew in lieu of taking notes in history class.
TS, I wish you were too high to make polls.

Quote by godisasniper
I like that currently the majority of voters would like you to be stabbed.

I like this post.
If you post in this thread, then the terrorists have won.

Nice goin' guys.

Also, theogonia777 wins this terrorist's dream of a thread.
Quote by kornflipsk8er
I ran into my uncle today on a busy street downtown.He was begging for change.It was only the second time I have seen him in over 15 years.He is a drug addict.All I could think of is how I wish I had the means to help him.I still appreciate the things he has done for me in the past and who he was then.He introduced me to bands like Pink Floyd and Deep Purple.It was very painfull to see him today but it was good to know he is still around.

Wow man, that's heavy. I can't empathize, but I sympathize.

Good luck to you and yours.

EDIT: OT, I appreciate all of your mothers.

That's one of the most ridiculous things I've ever seen.
Wanna come back to my place and make me some pizza rolls while I take a shit?
I'm better behaved here than I am IRL.

I'm loud, and likable enough IRL. I can command attention and get good results with a few well-placed words. At work, I'm respected and looked to for answers, jokes, and opinions.

Though not too well-known amongst you rotten little shits.

That does it, I'm gonna have to be more of an asshole around here from now on.
This thread makes me want to bust out the vacuum cleaner.

And a squirt bottle.

OT: My avatar has been the cover of a true Hip-Hop masterpiece.

This is exciting and unexpected news. I dug the shit out of the Baldur's Gate games.

Seriously, I have replayed these games so many times.

So. Many. Fucking. Times.

Quote by Carnivean
Isn't Dragon Age: Origins pretty much a new modern Baldur's Gate with a whole bunch of other stuff added anyway? I play that and it's awesome.

This. It's one of the things I loved most about Dragon Age. Especially when I pulled the camera back in the castles and dungeons.
To whoever posted the "Electric Relaxation" lines.

As for Saul Williams, "Ohm" is one of the greatest Hip-Hop pieces I've ever heard:

Through meditation I program my heart
to beat breakbeats and hum basslines on exhalation

I burn seven day candles that melt
into twelve inch circles on my mantle
and spin funk like myrrh

And I can fade worlds in and out with my mixing patterns
letting the Earth spin as I blend in Saturn
niggaz be like spinning windmills, braiding hair
locking, popping, as the sonic force
of the soul keeps the planets rocking
the beat don't stop when, soulless matter blows
into the cosmos, trying to be stars
the beat don't stop when, Earth sends out satellites
to spy on Saturnites and control Mars
cause niggaz got a peace treaty with Martians
and we be keepin em up to date with sacred gibberish
like "sho' nuff" and "it's on"
the beat goes on, the beat goes on, the beat goes

And I roam through the streets of downtown Venus
trying to auction off monuments of Osiris' severed penis
but they don't want no penis in Venus
for androgynous cosmology sets their spirits free
and they neither men nor women be
but they be down with a billion niggaz who have yet to see
that interplanetary truth is androgynous
and they be sending us shoutouts through shooting stars
and niggaz be like, "Whattup?" and talking Mars
cause we are so-lar and regardless of how far we roam from home
the universe remains our center, like

I am no Earthling, I drink moonshine on Mars
and mistake meteors for stars cause I can't hold my liquor
but I can hold my breath and ascend like wind to the black hole
and play galaxaphones on the fire escapes of your soul
blowing tunes through lunar wombs, impregnating stars
giving birth to suns, that darken the skins that skin our drums
and we be beating infinity over sacred hums
spinning funk like myrrh until Jesus comes
and Jesus comes everytime we drum
and the moon drips blood and eclipses the sun
and out of darkness comes a...
and out of darkness comes a...
and out of darkness comes the...
Quote by Primus2112

Yes. Good Taste. I just popped Black On Both Sides into a CD player this past week for the first time in at least seven years. If you can't tell from my current avatar, I'm a freak for DJ Premier beats.

One of my favorite Hip-Hop lyrics, Q-tip from the Roots' "Ital (The Universal Side)"

I use my music, implemented with jewels as thought tools
To inspire all these too-cool fools who say "Screw school"
'Cuz they don't see the conspiracy
That's put here to trap you and me
A Tribe Called Quest, The Pharcyde, Digable Planets. Yes, yes, yes...

Hip-Hop, Alternative, Jambands, Rock... Here's some stuff:

A.S.A.P. - Wrek The Art

The Roots - Ital (The Universal Side)

Uncle Tupelo - Chickamauga

Vigilantes Of Love - Skin

Widespread Panic - Radio Child
Wisconsinite here, reporting in to say that I spent the day outside in a t-shirt and pants.

No jackets, no hoodies.

Quote by Pagan_Poetry
Then Dwayne Johnson comes in, purple mushrooms Hogan and yells "DO YOU SMEEEEELLLL WHAT MY COCK IS COOKIN"

WWF now stands for World Wrestling Fucking. Forget the wildlife organization or WWE.
Yet somehow that's not as gay as actual wrestling *puts up flameshield*

It just occurred to me that Randy Savage probably ate enough Slim Jims in his lifetime to ensure that he hasn't dried up yet. In fact, I'm sure he laid enough meat on Miss Elizabeth for her to also remain sufficiently lubed. Preservatives FTW.

Necromania, brother!
Quote by Pagan_Poetry
OOOOO YEAH It's about to get real
How does my slim jim dick up Hogans ass feel?

He probably used Slim Jim grease to lube up Savage's dried-up "cavity".
I heard it was a 3-way with the Miss Elizabeth and Randy Savage.

Today's Miss Elizabeth and Randy Savage.
The Allman Brothers Band
Widespread Panic
Uncle Tupelo
Gov't Mule
Little Feat
Quote by Pagan_Poetry
...and prom was five or six years ago. Shit I'm getting old),

I'm 32 and what is this

OT: I've twisted ankles while stumbling home a number of times, but that's the worst of it.
My Dad and I listen to a lot of the same stuff. We've been to a whole shitload of concerts and music festivals together, we jam together (he blows harp), and we turn each other on to different music.

About the only thing that I can't get him to respond to is Hip-Hop...

I need to learn to be in less of a hurry...

I actually jumped right past the latter part of the stuff on top to get to the big story on the bottom.

Quote by jetfuel495
Remember when we had a llama forum?

Good times.

I remember that. I was gonna do a search a few days ago to see if it had returned at all.

But, I never did...
Happy Birthday. I got you a copy of your namesake on vinyl.

Just don't wind up workin' in a gas station.
Wow, great stories.

I've never hitch-hiked myself, but my Dad was a major hitch-hiker back in the day. He was born in '56 and regularly hitched rides everywhere throughout his teens. Based out of the Twin Cities in Minnesota, he had been from Florida to California and everywhere in-between.

When he was 15, he got picked up by the cops somewhere in Missouri. They held him until a detective of some sort from Minnesota could pick him up and take him back home. Well, this was the third time that this particular detective had retrieved my Dad from another state, and they had gotten to know one another well enough because of the hours that they had had to shoot the shit together on the highway.

So, they finally get back to Minnesota. My Grandmother is there to pick up my Dad from the station and the detective asks to speak with her for a moment. He tells her, "Mrs. ______, your son has seen a lot of the world by this point, and I don't see that he'll ever just stay home. So, here's what I recommend you do...".

My Grandma wrote a note saying, "I, _____ ______, am no longer responsible for the debts and actions of my son, _____ ______". This was made official with a stamp from a Notary Public, and served effectively as an adult's ID for my Dad from the age of 15 on. It got him everywhere too, even across the border into Tijuana.
Just listened to Ryan Adams and the Cardinals' Cold Roses for the first time in a while - maybe a year or more... Looking through the liner notes I notice that Neal Casal isn't even on that fucking album. Instead, it's a guy named J.P. Bowerstock on lead guitar.

So, at this point, I have to look this up to see what the deal is. Where could I have possibly gone wrong?

So, I was mistaken. Casal replaced Bowerstock for The Cardinals' Easy Tiger and played on everything else afterwards. These albums fall into that "touch and go" category that Adams so easily falls into. With the exception of the Follow The Lights EP; which, while being decidedly mellow, is pretty solid. It also contains an excellent cover of Alice In Chains' "Down In A Hole". And, I suppose, to be fair, Jacksonville City Nights gets better with each listen; but I was never crazy about it.
^ Okay, so they recorded 27 songs in the studio. Now, that looked like a short track list for Big Moon Ritual, but I see mention of a Magic Door in your post... At this point I'm assuming that they intend to release at least one other album this year.

I'm alright with this.
TS. Carny. You've been a demanding dick since the OP.

Also, if somebody takes care of this picture for you, are you still better than them?

I'd say this is a time for personal reflection. Do it for your father.

Quote by whoomit

Snacks. Delivered.
Oral hygiene is not smut.

Not unless it involves a hot chick, a camera, and an electric toothbrush.

Also, this thread sucks.
Quote by bluekirby7


So, maybe he wants the signature blurred out? Or the posters in the background?

Ah, it's the eyes. Definitely the eyes.
So, today I went to Guitar Center to pick up some extra strings. No sooner do I walk in the door than I see the kid at the door run over to the Marshall amps to break up a fight, or so I thought. It turns out to be one of the salesmen - blowing a customer for buying everything that he recommended.

So, the guy that was at the door whips out two sausage fingers and crams them in the salesman's ass, he didn't even spit on them. This made the salesman jump up at the same time that the customer came. The door guy got it in the eye, the sales guy was upset about his ass, and the customer realized he had been duped into buying an MG. So, while they were all crying, I grabbed an LP Custom Gibby and ran out the door with it.