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Hey ya'll, just wondering if any of you could help interpreting a little situation I have?

I've been dating a girl since about February (we are both 21 and university students), and things have been going very well.

About 1-2 years ago, my girlfriend had a huge crush on this other guy, and it seemed to her that it was reciprocated. They had a lot in common and were really close friends.

The thing was, this guy always denied it, despite her bringing it up with him, and him constantly flirting with her and basically hinting at something as well.

She ultimately realized that this guy was trying to mess with her head, and decided to completely cut this guy out of her life. It worked for the most part, although this guy still kept on trying to talk to her, which she ignored.

There was a bit of a period last year where they were out of each other's lives, but I think this year when I started dating her, he started trying to get back into her life, mostly bombarding her social media, liking everything she posts and commenting on everything.

She decided that they could try being friends again, except she would keep her distance from him, mostly only responding to comments he makes on Facebook or liking his stuff on social media.

Last week though, he made a comment on Facebook on something that she posted, explicitly saying that he was trying to mess with her head at one point, in the same manner some 16 year old would say "yea I ****ed her right in the pussy" to his buddies the next day.

I was fine with them talking and continuing to be friends, but he has to treat her with respect, which at that point he wasn't, and that doesn't fly with me. I brought it up with her, and she was a bit upset about the comment as well.

She didn't block him right away (I'm not sure why this wasn't her first instinct, seeing as she has no problem blocking other people), but she blocked him when I told her she should.

A few days ago, I noticed she unblocked him and was Facebook friends again with him after he brought it up in a post someone made on Facebook (they are all in the same circle of friends, and most of their friends don't know the situation).

This bothers me to be honest, why she's letting this guy back into her life like this despite the stuff he's put her through, and why she hasn't let her other friends know the situation.

What I don't understand is she's making it clear to me that she doesn't want anything to do with this guy, but why is she still trying to be distant friends with him?

I'd appreciate some perspectives from you folks, thank you very much.
Just a quick question:

I've noticed that after I deadlift, the tips of my fingers will end up becoming numb and feel 'prickly'. I think it might be because all of the blood in my fingers is being squeezed to the tips when I deadlift.

Is this normal, something that I just have to get used to?
You're probably pressing way too hard when you're playing guitar anyways, I would ease up a little bit.
Hey guys, I was wondering if you could help out a friend of mine:

She's been dating this guy since February. At first, it was a little bit shaky. She didn't want to be in a relationship yet (they were both previously friends, and he decided to ask her out for Valentines), but ultimately decided to do it since she did really like the guy. It went well for a while, but she occasionally had doubts about it all. Basically, she likes the guy, but he's not exactly her ideal guy.

Regardless, she eventually sorted it all out during the beginning of summer, and their relationship went very well all summer. She said she simply just needed time to really think about it all, and she was thankful that this other guy was so patient with her.

It's the end of summer now, and apparently since around the beginning of August, she's been having an issue with the fact that she is vegetarian (for religious reasons), and he isn't. It's a 'pet peeve' of hers for a guy that she's dating to eat meat. She also says there's slight compatibility issues since she is deeply religious, and he is of a different faith.

She said she already tried to compromise (he doesn't eat meat around her) and live with it, but it didn't work out.

She's not exactly sure how handle this debacle, and I'm not sure if I can really related to her enough to give her good advice. I'd greatly appreciate it if anyone could help out. Thanks!
I usually start off my working deadlift sets with an over hand grip for both hands, and then usually on the last set if I really have to I'll do a mixed grip with one hand over and the other under. Usually works out for me, although I'm not pulling significant weight yet.
Out of curiosity, for those of you who can bench significant weight, can you also do one handed pushups with ease?
It depends on what kind of band you are forming, what your plans for the future are, and how serious you are intending this to be. Do you just want to form a cute little band with your buddies that you can jam with every week, or are you intending on eventually making money with the band and 'making it'?.

From what I've seen bands that form from a group of friends tend to eventually develop some kind of drama due to petty differences (for example, someone is causing trouble but no one wants to say anything because you're bros), whereas with people who are more or less business partners, people are more likely to settle differences quickly (ie. point out when someone doesn't like a certain part of a song, kick people out, etc).

That being said usually the latter end up becoming your bros anyways if you end up going anywhere, and the band would be more solid.
Quote by crazysam23_Atax
Sadness and depression aren't even comparable.

OT:
I've experienced minor depression.

Also, I've had a few friends who experienced depression. It sucks, because you try to help them and it doesn't do much. Encouraging them to get counseling helps a lot, though.

Yea, I definitely wasn't trying to compare the two. I've never had depression so I can't really relate.

I had a buddy of mine come to me quite often last year with girl problems that he wanted help with. I helped him out quite a bit at first, but it got to a point where it started to seem like he was depressed so I told him he should take a visit to the mental health counselors that the uni offered. He said he would go the next day and I haven't really heard about it since, but he's been getting better.
Thankfully I have never experienced depression. I've experienced sadness before, but it was typical teenager stuff with girl problems and school. The fact that I got over it most likely meant it was nothing serious.
I feel bad for the little girl, she's going to have to live with that for the rest of her life. It's unfortunate for the instructor as well, and what his family will be going through.
I've been in a caloric deficit all summer while running regularly and doing body weight exercises, but still managed to remain the same weight (in a good way). Based on how my physique noticeably changed for the better, it seems like I gained muscle and lost fat (y). Looking forward to the school year when I have access to a gym and will eat a lot more (at home my mom cooks everything and I'm too lazy to consciously eat more).

What do you guys think of limiting the amount of carbs you eat, and eating more protein to compensate for the reduced calories?
A lot of things that I know about my parents come from me overhearing them talk with each other about their childhoods (whenever that topic comes up). They think I don't understand Vietnamese very well for some reason so they think I know nothing.

Within the past 5 years or so, since I've graduated high school and started university my dad has been telling me more about himself that he's never talked about before. Both my parents went through pretty deep shit just to have the chance to get to Canada from Vietnam (first time my dad tried to leave he got caught and had to spend 5 years at a labour camp, after that he managed to escape to Thailand where he lived at a refugee camp for about 3 years before coming to Canada).
Towards the end of the 19th century, physicists all thought that they had this physics stuff figured out, and it was just a matter of making more accurate measurements. Then they started making observations that couldn't be explained using the classical physics that was known at the time (look up the photoelectric effect, the orbit of Mercury, the Michelson-Morley experiment, for a few examples).

So who knows? Everything that is accepted now is accepted based on all of the experiments that have been done up until now that fit with the theories that have been developed, and all of these predictions (the existence of wormholes, all of these exotic particles) come as consequences of the theories that have so far been confirmed, which have a mathematical basis.

Some of the newer physics (a popular one is string theory) are based almost entirely on mathematics, and can't be verified through experiments anytime soon unfortunately.

You just have to be careful not to get too caught up in speculating about how the universe works without working it out quantitatively (with mathematics) and providing evidence for your theories.
Quote by Fryer Mike
I would argue that light has no actual speed limit, but our ability to observe does. What I mean is that if you were an omnipotent, omniscient being, you would be seeing everything all the time, everywhere. We are limited to this universe due to the fact that we ARE this universe in essence. My belief is that "light" or photons, being perceived as a particle, and acting as wave... is due to the fact that it is not actually a part of this universe or reality. However just because it's not a part of reality doesn't mean that it doesn't exist. Darkness however, is the absence of existence. Ya dig?


The idea that nothing can travel faster than the speed of light wasn't actually an observation made through experimentation like you are suggesting, but a consequence of Einstein's postulates that he made for his special theory of relativity.

Experiments were done that showed that light photons traveled at the same speed no matter what reference frame you were in (look up the Michelson-Morley experiment). Notice how there is no mention of a speed limit, or what speed light travels at yet.

From that observation, Einstein proposed two postulates, the first being that the speed of light is the same every in every inertial reference frame (so far confirmed from experiments), and that the laws of physics are the same in all inertia reference frames (this is another observable thing).

From those two postulates alone, you can derive the Lorentz transformations, which allow you to go between reference frames while still respecting the fact that the speed of light is the same in all reference frames:



If you look at the gamma factor though, you'll notice that you have velocity divided by the speed of light. If you have anything that travels faster than the speed of light, you'll end up with a negative square rooted, which is physically impossible.

That is where the idea that nothing can travel faster than the speed of light came from, so if you want to prove that things can travel faster than the speed of light, you'll have to prove that the speed of light in a vacuum is not the same every where. Physicists didn't just one day say that nothing can travel faster than the speed of light just 'cuz, it was a logical consequence of observations made through experimentation.
Quote by DamienEx1021
Video

He explains my point at around 2:00, with a really nice animation too
Quote by DamienEx1021
The "speed of dark" is faster than the speed of light so you could utilize that as a means of communication.

Not necessarily. Dark is just the absence of light, which means it'll still travel at the speed of light. Shadows can 'move' faster than the speed of light, but that's just us thinking that shadows are real objects.
Quote by captaincrunk
are they really sound waves? or is it just "like" a sound wave?

They are just 'like' sound waves, in the sense that sound waves as we know it (when you hear a sound) are longitudinal pressure waves in a gas. For solids it's the same idea (although I'm pretty sure it could be both longitudinal and transverse waves).
Quote by Dirge Humani
A sufficiently long poking stick would compress itself at the speed of sound in that material, which would slow any poking to below relativistic speed.

Just to add, at the atomic level things are held together through electromagnetic interactions between atoms or molecules. When you push an object, the whole object actually does not move at the same time, but rather it compresses at the point that you pushed it, which then sends a sound wave through the object until it gets to the other end of the material.

In an everyday scenario, objects are usually small enough, and sounds waves are fast enough that we don't notice it, so it seems like the whole object is moving at the same time.

It might be possible if you had a material that was infinitely rigid though, although that doesn't exist.
Just pick any popular song and make a fingerstyle arrangement, like what Sungha Jung (Korean guy who plays guitar on Youtube) does. I'm not going to lie I've been considering buying an acoustic just so I can do that. Playing electric guitar by yourself isn't as fun as it used to be : /
^I always take my shoes off whenever I do anything that requires my lower body in any way to balance on my feet (squats, deadlifts, barbell rows, military press, etc). I've never had a problem and prefer no shoes, although I didn't have any existing issues with my feet before I started lifting.
Yea, when I first ran Runkeeper it wasn't locking on to the GPS satellites, but I just set it anyways and I ended up getting good signal.

I think there's a limit to how many productivity or life management apps you can have before it starts becoming inconvenient. Myfitnesspal actually made things a lot easier for me when I used it. I record my workouts in a physical notebook anyways, so I think switching to an app would be more convenient (plus I can use the data to get certain insights about my progress, and a bit of motivation).
Do any of you guys use any kind of app on your phone for tracking fitness related things, or even helping with your workouts?

Recently discovered Runkeeper for tracking my running (distance, pace, and how long I run). I used myfitnesspal for tracking my food over a year ago. I'm considering just setting up a spreadsheet to track everything (I can even make nice graphs :3), since I can use office mobile to edit on the go and have it all synced up.
Some of the Canada geese around here are pretty aggressive, I'd imagine some foreigners would get into quite a bit of trouble trying to get past some of them
Just a quick out of context question: in what situations would a girl ask a guy whether he was in a relationship or not?

Context: I met a girl on the bus about a week ago. I was talking with a friend and she turned around and started talking to us (it turns out she's 24 (I'm 20) and doing extra classes to boost her GPA for graduate school). We all ended up talking mostly about school for the rest of the bus ride (this is a long commute back from school).

I saw her again this week and I decided to talk to her just for the heck of it since she seemed like a good person to learn from. We ended up getting into pretty deep and stimulating conversation about life, and she was really opening up to me about her life. It actually caught me a bit off guard because at one point I thought she was about to cry (she was talking about how she had all of these plans for her life by the time she got her undergraduate degree, and how it didn't turn that way at all).

Then almost out of the blue she asked if I was in a relationship. I don't remember the conversation leading up to it but I remember there was a long pause in the conversation where I was thinking about something, and then she asked me. I answered and we started talking about relationships and what I though about it all. I asked her if she was in one herself to continue the conversation and she said she wasn't.

I don't know why but around that point I felt some kind of tension between us. It was probably all in my head, but I honestly felt like if I had gone in for a kiss she would have kissed back. I stopped talking and just looked out the window, and from the corner of my eye I saw her quickly look at me, then look away about 2-3 times. I looked at her and asked her if she wanted to say something, but she just said she was looking at some light outside, which I'm 99% sure is bs. After that there was just a brief exchange where she asked me what I was thinking, and the following conversation seemed very different from the way we were talking before.

I'm probably thinking too much about this in retrospect, but I'm curious how others here with more social/emotional intelligence than I do interpret it all? I'm probably never going to see her again, but right now I'm actually going through a phase of just working on my social skills and I'd like some feedback. Thanks!
Quote by lt mittens
anyone else has experienced that the weight in gyms is like 'different'? i mean in my regular gym i could rep bench with 180lbs 10 times. an hour ago i'm back from my first workout in 2 months in another gym and and i could rep 155 for like 8 reps. the plates are iron where i normally train but here they are like rubber.

Someone actually went ahead and weighed the weights at different gyms:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Ovx5HrM-v0
Quote by ProtoCosmos
A bit better, but I think my problem is a lack of social/romantic experience because of my past dealings with social anxiety.

How do you feel about starting conversations with random people or strangers? Things like social experience can only really come from practice. Consider making more of an effort to talk to people around you that you see every day, but never really talked with (i.e. people you sit around in class). Don't have any pretensions, just talk to them for the sake of it. In the long run you'll get better at approaching people and talking to them. It's a good life skill to have.

With regards to this girl, why don't you try catching up with her after class and just starting a conversation about the class? Ask her a question about what you just learned, it's a pretty normal thing to talk about and you get to interact with this girl some more. Just take baby steps.

Usually in a situation like this I would suggest just talking to her first about school, and then eventually talking about other things, and then eventually just asking her out for coffee, but I don't think you're at that stage yet with your social anxiety.
Anyone here into calisthenics?

I started doing nothing but bodyweight exercises (following a reasonable progression to increase the resistance) and running three times a week. Surprisingly, I gained 10 pounds since the beginning of summer. It might be because I'm eating more now that I'm living at home for the summer, or because I'm actually getting good sleep. Either way, I'm actually really liking it. I might consider not getting a gym membership next year at school doing bodyweight stuff and just using that money for dance and muay thai classes.
Would a girl ever "test" you by trying to get sexual with you and seeing how far you are willing to go?
Thanks for the replies. It's just that for some reason during it all it just didn't feel right. Afterwards I thought about it and thought that maybe it was just a fling or one night stand kind of thing, considering that she's leaving on Sunday.
Quote by megano28
This requires details, especially when it comes to what happened after it got heavy

Do you mean what happened in the car? It just died down and eventually we ended up just making out, and she drove me home.

Quote by chev
Well you're not gonna get anything from us. It's on you and her to talk about it and decide where you two stand with eachother. And you gotta decide what you really want with her.


I forgot to mention that she's going off to a different city for summer school this Sunday, I do not see anything happening.
Hey guys, I need a little bit of help analyzing something:

1. Met girl in grade 11, became infatuated.
2. Got to know her finally in grade 12, because friendzoned (asked her out, got rejected).
3. We both move on, but in the following months it feels like she's interested.
4. Graduate, and move on to separate schools, but keep on touch one and off throughout the years.
5. So second year just ended, and we were talking for a bit on and off.
6. Today we meet up to go for a walk at a park, and we end up making out, and then got to her car and started escalating (but we had no condom so...)

Not sure what to make of that. I tried to keep it short, so it you guys need any clarification, I would gladly clarify.

Thanks
I need some help with a friend here, and would really appreciate if someone could offer a bit of advice.

Just a quick background on him in another post I made here: https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showpost.php?p=32029903&postcount=3243

Since then, he improved greatly, and I thought all was going well. He started focusing more on school, and even got into running. Pretty much feeling high on life. Even started looking at other girls.

Unfortunately, he ended up falling for another girl. This time though, he seemed to have done everything right. Got close to her, and then for Valentine's Day even asked her out. He got rejected though. He was actually fine with it, until on Valentine's Day when he tried talking to her again, she responded with something along the lines of, "I'm sorry, but I don't have time for friends anymore". That's about the jist of it. The situation is quite complicated because the girl is actually going through a lot of shit in her life (father passed away, wants to get into med school, etc).

So he came to me again. I told him to not talk to her until after the stress of midterm season is done, but this guy goes off and texts her a week later, and so far she hasn't responded. He's devastated now.

Everything that happened these past few months was apparently undone. I'm quite annoyed with him to be honest. I advised him not to get too attached to this girl, said that trying to get into a relationship with her right now (especially since her father passed away just last summer) is asking for trouble, and told him not to text her, and let everything die down first (or at the very least only talk to her in person), and he didn't listen.

It's quite obvious his problem is that he's extremely needy. He's a chronic texter, always the one to initiate conversations, and always gets attached to girls he falls for.

At this point it's out of the area of my own experience. I don't know what to say to him. Obviously what worked for me won't work with him.

Thanks
This is not even cringy, I just want to punch the last few guys in the face.
Quote by Lord_Doku
You shouldn't be going to college/uni thinking you're going to learn anything. Bad mindset that can only lead to disappointment.

Mileage may vary ofc.

Then you shouldn't be going to university if you're not expecting to learn anything.

Canada and most of the world use college to describe an institution that is more trade based or applied and university to describe an academic institution.
Quote by BuckinFuffalo
Good guess on the engineering, but I'm actually in a business program

Queens commerce?

I always thought Canadian tuition was cheaper than in the US, because I'm currently doing a degree in astrophysics and I'm paying around 10k a year at one of the higher ranking schools in Canada (if that means anything). I haven't bought books (unless the used some obscure book for assignments) since first year so I'm saving money on that end.
Quote by BuckinFuffalo
Canadian reporting in, my tuition alone this year was $15k plus a mandatory $1k student fee. Without buying books, having food, or a place to stay, it's $16k a year for me. This shit sucks.

Are you in an engineering program? They all seem to generally cost more than any other program that I've seen

Also not sure what the laws are like in your country but in Canada Universities are not allowed to force students to buy online course-ware, there should always be an alternative marking scheme (not sure if that's a feral law, or a provincial one, or even if its only just a school policy).
I would love to do this but I'm already occupied with a full course load at the University I'm attending. Maybe during the summer though
Failed two courses last term. Totally deserved it.
I don't think it's segregation in the sense that people are forced into ghettos, people that have more things in common just tend to live close to each other. I wonder what it looks like in Southern Canada.
They're called porn actors for a reason