Jack White Vows To Set New World Record

Jack White is determined to gain a spot in the Guinness Book Of World Records.

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Jack White is determined to gain a spot in the Guinness Book Of World Records. Having been refuted in his claim that he and former White Stripes bandmate Meg White staged the shortest concert in history the "performance" consisted of one note and a cymbal crash White says he will now attempt to establish a record for "most metaphors in a single concert".

In a statement posted on his website, White writes: "Third Man Records encourages all attendees of said concerts to please not interfere or interject with any metaphors that they witness during the show as to not disqualify or worse yet, trivialize the metaphor in question. In addition, all concert attendees are encouraged to entice as many metaphors to occur during the show that they possibly can, as long as they don't endanger themselves or Mr. White."

With tongue firmly in cheek, White also writes: "The attempt may prove very exhausting and at times even dangerous, but the results could prove to be glorious and possibly even vainglorious."

Thanks for the report to Russell Hall, Gibson.com

21 comments sorted by best / new / date

    Crofty89
    Third Man Records encourages all attendees of said concerts to please not interfere or interject with any metaphors that they witness during the show as to not disqualify or worse yet, trivialize the metaphor in question. In addition, all concert attendees are encouraged to entice as many metaphors to occur during the show that they possibly can, as long as they dont endanger themselves or Mr. White
    You keep using that word, I do not think it means what you think it means.
    jrodgers
    This is obviously some kind of joke Jack is making here with this whole statement. I just do not get it at all.....
    tennesseehild
    K? What most metaphors at a concert think Marilyn Manson would win that crown as soon as you dawned it Mr. White
    Anthony1991
    You do have to ask what's the point. All you'll get is twats dressed as clowns or whatever going to gigs.
    jrodgers
    rockchalk0607 wrote: maybe it's a metaphor of how you can get guinness records for nonsensical crap like this
    Yeah you're probally right. But I think Jack wanting to get in the records book for going up on stage playing a single note is also nonsensical crap
    Grohlism
    It's quite obvious he's having a joke. If you look at the most recent news on his website it takes what's written here to extremes. And "With tongue firmly in cheek" doesn't half give it away either.
    Bonscott4ever
    Couldn't he just set one by being in the most bands? I'm pretty sure he's well on his way to that one.
    6-String_Madman
    What's the point of having a Guinness world record? Hey Jack, just stick to playing great music like you always do.
    Zanos7
    and when this fails: Jack White: I will be in the books for most burps during a song. No, ok, ok, ok Erm how about, for tapping my foot the most times during a song? No, Ok ive got it! Jack White: Currently holds the world record for most stupid/failed attempts! Oh whats that? they dont even want me in the books, oh, so this is all for nothing then?
    Zanos7
    how great would it be though if his mockery of the world records actually earned him one through people (and himself of course) just taking the p***