KISS Cremation Urn Unveiled

The band is expanding its branded merchandise to now include a Kiss cremation urn.

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If you're not sold on the idea of the KISS coffin, or if you simply don't want to be buried in a cemetery, your friends in Kiss have solved that dilemma for you. The band is expanding its branded merchandise to now include a Kiss cremation urn. Is there nothing Gene Simmons won't think of? The urn, manufactured by Eternal Image, Inc., is now available for purchase. What a fashionable way to store the ashes of the KISS fan in your life!

Eternal Image's Donna Shatter said, "We call this particular KISS urn our 'Monument' model." She continued, "This urn offers fans a unique expression of their passion for the legendary rock band. It features full-color images of the band members and the Kiss flame logo - all displayed against a striking black metallic finish."

Three other models of the KISS cremation urn are planned for later this year. Because you can never have too many choices when it comes to an urn. It'll look striking on your mantelpiece and is much less morbid than, you know, your traditional urn.

Thanks for the report to Noisecreep.com.

60 comments sorted by best / new / date

    shreducator
    Wilbo Baggins wrote: I think Dimebag Darell would have been unable to decide.
    No disrespect to Dime, but that's right on, lol.
    Tcsanchez
    This Has To Be A Fucking Joke haha Damn Gene Simmons Your A Sick Ass Comedian.
    !SOAD!
    I hope they die and get cremated in that lame urn, then well laugh
    CliffBurton321
    PatVanHalen5150 wrote: KISS condoms & KISS Kaskets/urns....Gene gets ya comin & goin.
    hahahahahahaha!! good man, good man
    Higgzy
    Hamham272 wrote: Gene, you want to know why some people hate you? THIS is why some people hate you. You ruin the bands legacy.
    They never had a legacy. Also, their merchandising is disgusting.
    Jtrocks1356
    Higgzy wrote: Hamham272 wrote: Gene, you want to know why some people hate you? THIS is why some people hate you. You ruin the bands legacy. They never had a legacy. Also, their merchandising is disgusting.
    KISS definitely had a legacy - note: HAD. Say what you want about their music and their members, they were pioneers of stage shows and heavy influences on alot of modern bands. Yes their legacy is ruined due to money, but to say they never had a legacy is ignorant and ill informed.
    FourTwoZero
    PatVanHalen5150 wrote: KISS condoms & KISS Kaskets/urns....Gene gets ya comin & goin.
    Lol'd
    Sammeir123 wrote: For some reason I read the whole article in Troy McClure's voice.
    Thats odd because for some reason I read the article in Billy Mays voice...
    ninfan200
    this is proof that kiss is the ONLY band that can get away with selling out
    ampoverload
    We woulda have seen one of these long before today if Dime had been cremated RIP Dime
    Chronologo
    what next?? KISSEMETERY??, Hey Gene I got a new idea with KISS, why don't you KISS my a**?
    Hamham272
    Gene, you want to know why some people hate you? THIS is why some people hate you. You ruin the bands legacy.
    nnb
    Between all the fire breathing and pyro in their live shows, this seems like a good idea.
    Talon64
    What's next when Gene die is he gonna release limited edition vials with a grain of his cremated ashes.... "Gene you can't take money with you when you die you F..ken idiot" surely you've made enough money off saying "{insert the cities name} you guy are the greatest audience we've ever played to" time to dismantle the money making machine and start playing real music, I once called myself a kiss fan but as I've grown i have come to realize what a money making machine it has become and to Kiss all the fans are walking dollar bills
    Lost Dog
    I am now convinced that KISS was never a band. They were always a corporation run by Gene Simmons who made up some theme songs.
    NHECOS
    As long as there are suckers buying this $hit, they'll always keep coming up with new ridiculous stuff.
    adambauman31
    who gives a damn? obviously if you think it's wrong you won't be buying one for your family members and if somebody actually wants to be cremated in one, then why not?
    dale-banez
    My God...I'm just going to have to go outside and yell FU CK really loud.
    theogonia777 wrote: a coffin? an urn? what next? KISS taxidermy?
    Next in line would most likely be an official KISS tomb. Haha...if I ever see that day, it'll be the FU CK heard 'round the world
    BuffysPregnant
    Unless someone's life was literally all about Kiss. They were as close to being one of the members them self, had every album, saw every tour, learned all their songs on every instrument, then MAYBE. MAYBE this would be an okay idea. Other than that it's just plain stupid.
    nailsarecruel
    If you're not sold on the idea of the KISS coffin, or if you simply don't want to be buried in a cemetery,
    Or if KISS isn't truly dead to you yet...
    MonsterOfRock
    Feel sorry for the person whose ashes are gonna be stored in these things. Billy: Oooh! A Kiss ashtray! *shakes cigarette ashes into the urn* Dad: Noooo!!! Thats yer Grandpa!
    TJ1991
    Well this is ridiculous. Somewhat ironically, Gene Simmons makes me want to die.
    xHellbound
    Lapidus wrote: sigh, Crusty's imagination has no limit..
    You meant Krusty, right? And yes, I can see Krusty making a cremation urn as well. OT: My uncle would love this thing! Huge Kiss fan.
    Pit_
    I wonder if the KISS band members are gonna be packaged in these, when they'll die? I can see it now, Gene Simmons' cadaver in a KISS sarcophagus.
    Pagan_Poetry
    I really want to say something, but the last time I told my honest opinion about Gene Simmons I got a warning, so I'll try my best to tone it down. I used to like Kiss until Gene Simmons opened his mouth off record and until I saw the thousands of things I can buy. It's not music anymore. It's a marketing scheme. It sucks because I grew up really loving the guitar work of Ace Frehley (sp?) and now I can't stand to listen to Kiss. It feels like I paid a marketing giant and not a band. I'd rather be taken seriously by those I listen to. But hey, if this urn thing is cool for anyone else, then so be it. I just feel differently about this kind of thing. Maybe I'm wrong about it. Maybe this is awesome for the ultimate collector and I'm just being a pessimist. Either way, that's my stance.
    Mulldarran
    Profit on people's death? Why not. Tell me Simmons, are you going to be put in one of these when you die?
    shikkaka
    I look forward to the comments on KISS articles more than the articles themselves.
    HouseAtlantic
    For some reason I read the whole article in Troy McClure's voice.
    I just had to go back and re-read the entire article. Loooool.
    Pagan_Poetry
    Root Beer wrote: Pagan_Poetry wrote: I really want to say something, but the last time I told my honest opinion about Gene Simmons I got a warning, so I'll try my best to tone it down. I used to like Kiss until Gene Simmons opened his mouth off record and until I saw the thousands of things I can buy. It's not music anymore. It's a marketing scheme. It sucks because I grew up really loving the guitar work of Ace Frehley (sp?) and now I can't stand to listen to Kiss. It feels like I paid a marketing giant and not a band. I'd rather be taken seriously by those I listen to. But hey, if this urn thing is cool for anyone else, then so be it. I just feel differently about this kind of thing. Maybe I'm wrong about it. Maybe this is awesome for the ultimate collector and I'm just being a pessimist. Either way, that's my stance. They never WERE about the music; it was ALWAYS a marketing scheme.
    I know. But when you're a kid, you're naive. I was very naive, sadly. Once I started to see what it was all about, I liked them less and less.
    nnb
    I used to like Kiss until Gene Simmons opened his mouth off record and until I saw the thousands of things I can buy. It's not music anymore. It's a marketing scheme. It sucks because I grew up really loving the guitar work of Ace Frehley (sp?) and now I can't stand to listen to Kiss. It feels like I paid a marketing giant and not a band. I'd rather be taken seriously by those I listen to. But hey, if this urn thing is cool for anyone else, then so be it. I just feel differently about this kind of thing. Maybe I'm wrong about it. Maybe this is awesome for the ultimate collector and I'm just being a pessimist. Either way, that's my stance.
    Although I get what you mean, but I've actually always respected these guys because the've always admitted that there in it for the money, fame and women. Unlike many bands who say their init for the music their clearly not. With that said KISS still have produced some great music and from what I hear are a great live band.
    the_edge17
    Riots in the middle east, riots in the UK, natural disasters crippling nations...and now this...the world is ending