Lamb Of God Singer To Run For President

Randy Blythe promises to be shot on live TV after taking his oath if he wins the Presidency, among other extraordinary promises.

Lamb Of God Singer To Run For President
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Lamb Of God frontman Randy Blythe has announced that he will make a bid to become President. In an extraordinary rambling blog post, Blythe says the present candidates lack "balls", before making an unusual promise for when he is finally sworn in: "My first act as President of the United States will to be shot. That's right, SHOT. With a high-powered assault rifle. Immediately after taking the oath of office, I will be escorted about twenty yards away and be shot publicly in a non-lethal area of my body by a highly trained Navy SEAL sniper. It will hurt like f--k." Blythe says he will do this because he doesn't expect anyone in the armed forces to do anything he wouldn't. "Me being shot will be broadcast live world-wide via satellite, with no bleeping out of the incredible string of curse words I will undoubtedly let fly with. I will be required to walk/limp/crawl on my own power a minimum of 50 yards through the mud to an ambulance that will take me away to patch me up. If I can't make it on my own, I'm not tough enough to be your President. "After all the nations in the entire world witness America's new President, an insane looking heavily tattooed freak, getting shot ON HIS OWN ORDER as soon as he takes office, then crawling all bloody to an ambulance, cussing the whole way and screaming pure hate in a monstrous voice tortured by years of touring and Marlboro Reds, they will think twice before f--king with us," he adds. Among his impressive list of promises are to: - Take 13 weeks of Marine Corps training - Kill an enemy prisoners in hand-to-hand combat - Kill the first enemy of any war - Change the rules of engagement so troops can shoot before the enemy strikes - Kick some a-- - Drink beer - Get laid - Bless America Blythe appears to focus on foreign policy rather than discuss economic issues, suggesting he may be better suited for the role of Secretary of State. His slogan? "F--k the dumb s--t. Let's get real here."

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    tdrules
    It's a shame none of his promises are to make a better album than Ashes Of The Wake
    iommi600
    this is guy is just out of his mind, or trolling really hard. anyway, lol'd at this
    Battman1993
    Abacus11 wrote: Alcohol is a powerful drug.
    Adrian89 wrote: Booze is speaking...
    He's sober you dumbasses. He's been sober since '07 or so.
    NHECOS
    America... actors become presidents, governors, even that wrestling guy with paint in his face has a political position... only in the US.
    GuitarGuyNack
    I think he's ****ing crazy.That said it would by cool to see the pres get shot on live tv.
    SmittyMan90
    Hahaha well you have to admit it would be a spectacle. Maybe that years Superbowl half time show.
    Beakwithteeth
    The day we elect this dipshit president and don't get immediately bombed by another country is the day I lose faith in the entire world.
    A CATSHOVEL
    shot publicly in a non-lethal area of my body
    he doesn't expect anyone in the armed forces to do anything he wouldn't.
    I'm pretty sure they get shot in the lethal areas. Just Saiyan.
    Ibeanez
    Voting for an arrogant prick who knows nothing about anything? I'm pretty sure we've been doing that for quite a while already.
    captainsnazz
    My only worry is that he'll be laid to rest while fulfilling one of his promises. At least he'll have something to die for though I guess.
    Vypor
    beyondthegrave wrote: imo ashes of the wake is their worst album.
    IMO, Ashes was their very best album, by far. The other albums aren't bad - but Ashes has a sound that hasn't been achieved on any of the other albums. It just kicks ass - which is obviously what Randy would do if he was president. President's job is actually The commander and chief of our armed forces.
    James_Het_Rules
    If Blythe runs for President, it'd be a great excuse to vote. Thus far, there's been no one worth voting for. But everything Randy said was great, even if only meant to be comical.
    GREENWARRI0R
    MetalGS3SE wrote: GREENWARRI0R wrote: Stupidest thing I've ever read. Not funny, didn't laugh. Then don't comment. Everyone complains so friggin' much these days, jesus >_< Anyway, compared to our other options for the Republican party, Randy actually looks pretty appealing...
    Why can't I comment? I'm posting my opinion about this "news" article.
    WheredMyRockGo?
    Countsluggo wrote: I'm not a lamb of god fan. But I'd vote for him. I agree. Someone with some balls needs to be in office. Someone who's not afraid to say **** you to anybody.
    Didnt we have that before obama?
    pluginxbabyy
    SO AWESOME. I'd vote for Randy in a heartbeat to be Pres, especially with the parade of idiots going on right now. At least a metalhead would understand!
    ne14t
    I like how people think he is drunk or high or whatever cant a guy just have some fun and make a joke. At least he is promising stuff he could actually provide rather then just lying a bunch and raising taxes!
    Root Beer
    I don't even know this guy and I'd vote for him over the shit we're getting today.