Rock Goes Back To Work

For most people it's a normal return-to-the-grind Monday, complete with snoozed alarm clocks, hastily-bitten toast and a rushed half-cup of coffee.

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For most people it's a normal return-to-the-grind Monday, complete with snoozed alarm clocks, hastily-bitten toast and a rushed half-cup of coffee, followed by the brain-killing morning commute. And winter's on the way.

But spare a thought if you can for your friendly neighbourhood rock star the confusion caused by never having to know what day it is, the room-service luxury breakfast delivered closer to lunchtime, and if you're a certain type of performer the knowledge that even if you do have to work today, you don't have to get there on time.

Well, that's the theory. If it was that simple we'd all be famous, and we're not, so it can't be. Most of us like to think we know what we'd do if we made the big-time, though what instrument we'd play, what band we'd be in, what bars we'd frequent and what love interests we'd be chasing.

Going up in the world is great. But what about coming down? What if someone who was a star on Friday suddenly had to get up with the rest of us this morning and wait in line for the bus, tube or train? Where would they be going?

Rush drummer Neil Peart doesn't need much time to think about it. He tells QMI: "One of the first things I wanted to be was a forest ranger. I love the work they do. Another early ambition was to be a teacher, either English or History.

"Or advertising there's so much creativity there I laugh out loud sometimes at good slogans. Just before joining the band I was in the farm equipment business. My dad likes to joke that I'd have made a good parts manager."

White Stripes mainman (among other roles) Jack White has kept his day-job training with him: "I'd go back to being an upholsterer. I worked on the studio I built I upholstered some of the walls."

KK Downing of Judas Priest has recently built his own golf course, so it's no surprise when he says: "I'd like to be a golf pro." It's slightly more brow-raising when he adds: "Or a porn star. Or anything in between."

Billy Talent vocalist Ben Kowalewicz would like to keep working with his voice if it was up to him: I'd get into radio, he states. I'd love to have a talk radio show just an open hour-long show where people could talk about anything. If the band doesn't work out, give us a shout at Rock Towers, Ben.

So far, so intelligent.

Guitar virtuoso and Chickenfoot axeman Joe Satriani keeps it simple: "I'd be lord and master of the universe." Where would you apply, though?

Airbourne frontman Joel O'Keefe doesn't mess about either: "If someone told me to get a day-job I'd just punch em out and keep on playing."

Dan Auerback of the Black Keys knows exactly where you'd find him and why: "I'd cut french-fries at the Hamburger Station in Akron, Ohio, because that's all I'm qualified to do."

Finally, what about George Thorogood, the man who delivered the iconic lyric "Get a haircut and get a real job"? He's typically larger-than-life about the big question. "What would I do?" he asks. "Oh man What wouldn't I do?"

Thanks for the report to RockRadio.

49 comments sorted by best / new / date

    Jasonbts
    Peart and White are the only two who seriously answered the question. The rest... wow...
    rickyj
    jannick wrote: boring artists...
    dude, its satch, kk and niel ****ing peart
    cooljew
    rickyj wrote: Salvation138 wrote: and the moron from airbourne...must be nice not having to get a day job. guess that happens when you write bullshit radio rock with no substance at all. are you insane? it sounds literally exactly like ac/dc. you basically just called ac/dc a sellout radio band.
    my thoughts exactly, i'll take airbourne over any of the other bullshit nickelback three days grace bands on the radio. at least they rock.
    CydoniaKnight95
    Nameless742 wrote: not complaining. Better a fun article than a news story nobody cares about? Be happy it's not courtney love or Ozzy's got a new haircut.
    +1
    jannick
    rickyj wrote: jannick wrote: boring artists... dude, its satch, kk and niel ****ing peart
    exactly
    TheDissident
    ... why am I having trouble seeing KK playing golf? oh well, I found this interesting
    rgrockr
    uhhh... today's not a normal monday, it's Labor Day. Most people (or Americans anyway) aren't going to work.
    JD Blue Venom
    Nameless742 wrote: not complaining. Better a fun article than a news story nobody cares about? Be happy it's not courtney love or Ozzy's got a new haircut.
    this
    Jmoarguitar
    Joel is so damn awesome. Keep rockin with airbourne, you're keeping the heart and soul of rock n roll alive
    chocolateTeddy
    KK Downing of Judas Priest....says: "Id like to be a golf pro." Its slightly more brow-raising when he adds: "Or a porn star. Or anything in between."
    So Like a Pro Golf Pornstar? but Tiger Woods covered that. unless he has another reason to be surrounded by small hard balls :-p
    FearOfTheDuck
    Yes Joel O'Keefe! I don't see him working in your local store anytime soon, until he quits Airbourne to make a disco record
    js81221
    I like these. I mean, it's news about guitarist, singers etc. Keeps us friendly. Or a lick closer to being acquaintances
    SmittyMan90
    Nameless742 wrote: not complaining. Better a fun article than a news story nobody cares about? Be happy it's not courtney love or Ozzy's got a new haircut.
    True!
    Bored_97
    Shread_6009 wrote: Neil Peart wrote: I never wanted to be rock star.. I always wanted to be.. a LUMBERJACK SO MUCH WIN
    woah, easy there maddock
    KJKINFLAMES
    geese rockers gotta start doing more intense stuff.... us UGer's need out news fix, steal a car, get caught with pcp, kill a teletubbie... something geese the news just ****in sucks aaaaahhhhh and I got no idea who this guy is..... Dan Auerback of the Black Keys knows exactly where youd find him and why: "Id cut french-fries at the Hamburger Station in Akron, Ohio, because thats all Im qualified to do." but when I read that all I could think of is Nathan Explosion from Dethklok working at the burger place... funny stuff
    Ali-b912
    "If someone told me to get a day-job Id just punch em out and keep on playing."
    AUSTRALIA!
    boris6491
    if youre a certain type of performer the knowledge that even if you do have to work today, you dont have to get there on time.
    A certain W. Axl Rose comes to mind...
    devilex121
    not even close to news but... i really laughed out loud at KK Downing wanting to be a pornstar XD i'm sure we all have at least one pornstar we'd love to bang XD
    rickyj
    Salvation138 wrote: and the moron from airbourne...must be nice not having to get a day job. guess that happens when you write bullshit radio rock with no substance at all.
    are you insane? it sounds literally exactly like ac/dc. you basically just called ac/dc a sellout radio band.
    archangels
    Ben Kowalewicz as a radio DJ? Please, Ben, no. Your annoying voice sounds wonderful when you sing. Not so much when you talk.
    Nameless742
    not complaining. Better a fun article than a news story nobody cares about? Be happy it's not courtney love or Ozzy's got a new haircut.
    GettintheLedout
    UG needs a news section and a separate Blog section for the lists and fun articles like these (and keep em comin)
    Salvation138
    wow, satriani. you're so witty! master of the universe? LOL! and the moron from airbourne...must be nice not having to get a day job. guess that happens when you write bullshit radio rock with no substance at all.
    SilverSpurs616
    wtf is this? as usual UG baffle me with poor titles, and disappoint me further with the actual article
    Shread_6009
    Neil Peart wrote: I never wanted to be rock star.. I always wanted to be.. a LUMBERJACK
    SO MUCH WIN
    KingHenrik1967
    i actually thought this article would be about The Rock of wrestling fame, going back to work. i'm sorely disappointed.
    Nyhm
    Neil Peart wrote: I never wanted to be rock star.. I always wanted to be.. a LUMBERJACK (forest ranger)
    Gman400
    The guy from Airbourne sounds like a d-bag and Satriani sounds like a tool as usual. haha master of the universe...cracks me up -_-
    jimmysaint
    Guitar virtuoso and Chickenfoot axeman Joe Satriani keeps it simple: "Id be lord and master of the universe." Where would you apply, though?
    awesomeness
    chedita
    neil peart would be the best teacher in the world I would die to have neil peart as my english teacher.