Happy Fools Day: Grunge Cult to Build Time Machine

A kickstarter project is raising funds to build a time machine so a grunge music cult can travel to the late 1980s and witness the original alt-rock revolution. But will it ever take off?

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A cult of grunge fans have pledged to build a time machine so they can travel back to the late 1980s and witness the original grunge revolution.

The group called Flanels have set up a kickstarter page asking for $9.8 billion to help fund research into time travel, arguing that time travel has not yet been disproven as a legitimate form of transport.

Their goal: to live through the alt-rock revolution with a checklist of goals including to witness the first live shows by Pearl Jam, Alice In Chains and Nirvana, to get a party apartment in Seattle, and to molest Dave Grohl.

But their leader Ellis Lapril, who models himself after Layne Staley, has already has to fight off criticism that their funds will not be directed towards legitimate research and instead could be used to fuel their hedonistic lifestyles.

"We're going to spend, like, 99.7 percent of our research budget on science sh-t," said Lapril. "That leaves only, like, three percent for beer an' sh-t."

Lapril is confident that their plan will succeed.

"Look around you and there's proof of time travel right in front of you. Try walking across a room. You're traveling through time, because the time is different when you arrive. We're just gonna walk backwards and make the time go backwards more. I wouldn't have 40 people committed to serving me if I didn't know how to do this for real dude. In fact I've done it before. I'm a caveman. The first one."

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32 comments sorted by best / new / date

    chrisa94
    "Look around you and there's proof of time travel right in front of you. Try walking across a room. You're traveling through time, because the time is different when you arrive. We're just gonna walk backwards and make the time go backwards more." Former AS Physics student talking - his science checks out. Support this visionary, please.
    thes50
    UG is this one of your April Fools jokes or is this actually a thing?
    PRSfanatic
    It's an obvious April fool's joke, but this wouldn't surprise me if it was really coming from a grunge fan. I mean seriously, who'd go back to such a fun time as the late 80's just to be all miserable and listen to grunge, when most of the great rock bands were still young and around back then!?
    solidrevolver19
    What if you go and enjoy both.
    PRSfanatic
    That'd be the best, but why not enjoy the 80's at their prime and then hop on to the early-mid 90's for some grunge... you know a couple of years wouldn't be enough time to enjoy all the great bands of the era
    nick1227
    You know for someone claiming to want 9.8 billion dollars for time machine research, you'd think they could get their math right. If you spend 99.7 percent of the research budget on "sciency shit" then you have 0.3 percent to spend on beer. Not 3 percent. Other than that though, seems legit.
    Jack2994
    I'm not sure if you're joking or just retarded...
    nick1227
    Well it started as a joke that the biggest problem about this is some shitty math, but now...now i'm not so sure...
    BigDrK
    It would have been cooler if it was real and the fake band was creating hype for a crazy movie.
    CHANDLER21
    Wait what?! Are they joking? They want millions of dollars so they can "build a time machine" to go back and visit grunge music????? 1. Why even go back for that kind of music when theres better music? 2. Like hell your going to put all that money toward a time machine! Probably gonna spend it on drugs. 3. Why not make a better use of a time machine? Like prevent deaths and such?