Kid Rock Is Upset for Being Dragged Into Insane Clown Posse Lawsuit Over His Glass Dildo, Unleashes Two Letters

artist: Kid Rock date: 08/06/2014 category: wtf?
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Kid Rock Is Upset for Being Dragged Into Insane Clown Posse Lawsuit Over His Glass Dildo, Unleashes Two Letters
In a odd string of events, Kid Rock was dragged into an Insane Clown Posse sexual harassment lawsuit, being prompted by the court to hand over an important piece of the puzzle, a glass dildo.

So a few lines about the legal case - in 2013, former employee of ICP's Psychopathic Records, Andrea Pellegrini, filed a lawsuit for sexual harassment, bullying and wrongful termination, taking aim at the band, their manager, as well as the label.

Fast forward to last month, another former Psychopathic employee, "Dirty Dan" Diamond, claimed attempting to give Pellegrini a glass phallus at one point, which she refused. The problematic item was reportedly later given to Kid Rock, who was subpoenaed to hand it over within two weeks.

Rock wasn't too pleased for having his name dragged around a dildo in the press, so he decided to unleash two steaming letters to the attorneys, summing them up via official website in a neat piece titled "All Parties Involved in This ICP Glass Dildo Case Can Shove One Up Their A-s." So off to the letter numero uno.

"Dear Jim Rasor and Jon Marko, I'm told that you have issued a subpoena for a 'glass dildo' that was supposedly given to me. No idea what you're talking about, and I definitely don't have it. I've never heard of, seen, or met any people involved in this case. But I'm pretty sure you already know that. What I do know is that you've been dragging my name around in the media to gain attention for your sad a-s excuse for a law firm. I don't care what you do when you finally catch up to the ambulances you chase, but I do care when you bring my name into it for no reason at all.

"Let me ask you this. Say in a lawsuit that another crappy firm was handling, your names were brought up for no reason. You wake up one morning, excited for a new day of exploiting the legal system and people dumb enough to look at your website (nice pictures btw, did you study how to look like douchebags in college?), and when you open the newspaper there's a report from someone you've never heard of talking about how Jon Marko and Jim Rasor got caught molesting animals at a petting zoo while high on bath salts.

"Now imagine you weren't the scumbags you are, but a citizen who has raised millions of dollars for his hometown, spent hours helping to promote the arts, had helped wounded veterans returning from combat. Say you were people who aren't a blight on our planet – wouldn't you be p-ssed off that your name, for days on end, was being mentioned in the press when EVERYONE involved knew you weren't involved in any way? Welcome to my side of this story."

The second letter reads, "Dear Brian E. Koncius, I'm told that your client has testified under oath in a deposition that he presented a former employee of Psychopathic Records with a glass dildo, who then allegedly gave the dildo to me? There are only two possible explanations for what your client said: either he is an absolute pathological liar, who for some insane reason decided to make up a bulls--t story using my name or two: he thinks he’s a comedian and was trying to be funny.

"If he was joking then he's just an a--hole who isn't funny. But if it was not 100% clear that he was attempting to make a joke, then he just lied under oath because I've never met your client, and if I had met your client I'd certainly remember if he tried to give me a glass f--king dildo. Even if it was the 'Rasor Law Firm' that sent a press release to the press, you have done nothing to clear up this blatant lie which makes you to blame too. It is obvious that all you a--holes are using my name and notoriety to garner publicity for yourselves, which makes you the worst kind of scum. You're the types of lawyers that make America a worse place for everyone.

"I live in Detroit because I can stay out of the fray here and live my life the way I chose to. If I wanted to deal with this s--t I'd move to LA, and if I want press, I can get it - trust me. No matter why your client said what he did, it’s clear that you, your client, and the Rasor Law Firm have gone out of your way to help get this story told. How would you feel if one day your name appeared across the internet connected to a story you knew absolutely nothing about.

"One day you come downstairs to the angry glare of your wife who asks if you really were arrested over the weekend for driving high on crystal meth with a bound and gagged hooker in your trunk. Did you? Because it's all over the internet, some lawyer you've never met put it out in a press release! Must be true right? I'm guessing you probably wouldn’t like that, and would at least appreciate it if the guy who made it up admitted that you never did those things. Your website says you represent people who are 'interested in doing the right thing.' I don't believe that, but prove me wrong."

Finally, David Draiman couldn't help but commenting the article posted on Blabbermouth's Twitter, expressing outrage about the ridiculous piece making headlines in the first place. Caps Lock was involved of course, you can check out the mini conversation below.

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