Singer Unable to Stop Farting After Surgery, Loses Job and Sues Government

Botched surgery leaves singer unable to sing without excessive gas, $2.5 million lawsuit raised.

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Following a routine surgery, opera singer Amy Herbst was left unable to sing without breaking wind.

Nashville Opera Company performer is now suing the government, claiming that the botched episiotomy she received during child birth last February has caused her to lose control of flatulence and bowel movements.

The surgery basically involves cutting the tissue between the anus and vagina for easier delivery. This time around, the cut didn't heal properly, leaving the singer with "a complete breakdown of the episiotomy and perineum and the external sphincter is disrupted and the vagina and rectum are basically connected without any perineal body."

Herbst is seeking $2.5 million in damages for being unable to perform. "She is suffering though a very embarrassing and very significant injury, and frankly, the prognosis of a fully successful repair is pretty low," the attorney stated.

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    This sounds like a South Park episode. Awesome!
    The song she would sing would be "Dust In The Wind" The flatulence would be the atmosphere that adds to the song.
    That would suck. Imagine having to wear a butt plug every time you wanted to practice.
    I kept thinking "poor girl, she's still cute, wish her all the best" then it all fell apart when I read this! XD Thanks for that.
    If she did some exercises, she could learn how to do one hell of a party trick. burping the alphabet? f--k you, I can fart the alphabet in any minor pentatonic scale of your choice.
    Pretty sure the alphabet is sang in a major key brah.
    the alphabet, not the alphabet song, aka twinkle twinkle little star. it's possible to count up to a thousand to the tune of In Bloom, so I don't see what the issue is here.
    Maybe she could pioneer a new genre? She could use her mouth for Soprano sounds and her bum-hole for Baritone. Now I feel bad... On a serious note that is pretty soul-destroying. I wish her luck in recovering.
    As terrible as this situation is, I came to the article for the comments. You guys never disappoint.
    I know i shouldnt laugh but i cant help it.I enjoy toilet humour.At least her Husband doesnt have to feel embarrased now when he farts.
    *checks date to make sure its not April 1st...* *....jaw drops open upon finding its not* Poor lady!!! That sucks on so many levels! I feel bad for her :S condolences?