The King Is Fat'N'Old review by Destrage

logo Ultimate Guitar
  • Released: Oct 4, 2010
  • Sound: 7
  • Lyrics: 6
  • Overall Impression: 7
  • Reviewer's score: 6.7 Neat
  • Users' score: 9.7 (34 votes)
Destrage: The King Is Fat'N'Old

Sound — 7
Never before have I seen balls as big as these. Out of nowhere while reading Terrorizer I come across this somewhat understated advert for a band for fans of 'Darkane, LoG and Protest The Hero'. Well, something like that has to sound different at least, so I checked out their music video for 'Jades Place'. What in the hell has happened to my brains..

Well, what met my ears was this random Rammstein assault of industrial speed and visual insanity. Okay, nothing too mad so far, but what the hell.. It all suddenly goes really really odd. All the time. Errk. But oddly enough, it DID remind me a lot of Protest the Hero and LoG and all those other randomly assorted comparisons. So I thought 'Hell, just get it to see what the rest is like'.

Right now, I cannot begin to tell you how so awful this album is and also how awesome it is. Okay, first track 'Double Yeah' is nothing too special or ridiculous, LoG sounding sort of speed fest with a few (major) tempo changes and inherent groove which is pretty much mad in its own right. Of course, there are still PTH style fills and random stop/starts here and there but its otherwise sane. The second track is where it gets a little bit more wacky. Spanish guitar and Chris Adler style drumming overdrive is a bit.. yeh, getting slightly nuts. Riffing is fairly coherent and somehow manages to sound like Daath in some places.. but ARG its everywhere.

Somehow it remains heavy. Even if deeply rooted in american groove/metalcore its still along the lines of utter madness. Some of the vocal lines are a bit Threat Signal/Linkin Park but its kind of hard to ignore everything else going on with the music. Its sort of like listening to SikTh for the first time: yeh, it may have a slightly bad vocal section but when everythings put together its like listening to a stream of bewilderment.

Okay, bafflement out of the picture for a moment, this is one really unique album. If PTH are the crazy sort of prog band that everyone likes, then Destrage is the proggy sort of crazy band everyone is undecided upon.

Lyrics — 6
The singer, Poalo (they're Italian), is one crazy nutter. Although yes, he does sound like Chester Bennington he balances this with also sounding like Randy Blythe on the other end of the metal spectrum. Well obviously a uniqe sort of talent, it does end up sounding confusingly heavy although at times I wish he'd drop his balls... just because that it sounds like Chester Bennington.

Lyrics... Lyrics are something I probably will leave out, suffice to say that not even the most highly paid of rap artists could come up with such silly lyrics as Paolo does. Hell, even the verses to 'Jades Place' gives enough hint, with him also chanting 'DOH DOH DOH' like Homer Simpson every now and then. If the guy from PTH pulls performing off with a serial killer expression constantly on his face, then Paolo does it with a herpaderpaderpa (Yes, I know, its not serious writing, but this is far from a serious band).

Overall Impression — 7
I don't know what to make of this album. I don't even know if I like it or not. There are some moments which I adore and some which are atrociously stupid, a lot of the time within 30 seconds of each other. Its a very marmite band, but fans of PTH, SikTh and even Mr Bungle would probably like this. If LoG was given weed and LSD in the studio and then recorded with Rody Walker and Luke Hoskin who were also under the same effects, this album is the result.

Songs to look out for: 'Twice the price', 'Jades Place', 'Back Door Epoque', 'Smell you later fishy', 'Collateral Pleasure', 'Homemade Chilli' (containing some hilarious Family Guy quotes), 'Tip of the day', 'Panda VS Koala' (whut?), 'Way Out', 'Back Door Reprise' (yet more whut...).

6 comments sorted by best / new / date

    Another note to add, its 'Smell you later fishy bitch' and 'Homemade chili italian sausage' or something.. Also, I was slightly boozed up at the time of typing this so.. yeh.
    Also, I was slightly boozed up at the time of typing this so.. yeh.
    Jeff Hanneman style. Panda vs Koala?
    krvolok wrote: Also, I was slightly boozed up at the time of typing this so.. yeh. Jeff Hanneman style. Panda vs Koala?
    Is serious. This band is retarded but the album isn't that bad.
    Panda vs Koala,I mean how high you have to be to make something up a title like that?
    They're just...mamma mia! And check out ralph's skills that are outstanding! Plus take a look to their last album, "Are you kidding me? No."